Clicking on banner ads keeps JWR alive
Jewish World Review Feb. 5, 2001 / 12 Shevat, 5761

Greg Crosby

Greg Crosby
JWR's Pundits
World Editorial
Cartoon Showcase

Mallard Fillmore

Michael Barone
Mona Charen
Linda Chavez
Ann Coulter
Larry Elder
Don Feder
Suzanne Fields
James Glassman
Paul Greenberg
Bob Greene
Betsy Hart
Nat Hentoff
David Horowitz
Marianne Jennings
Michael Kelly
Mort Kondracke
Ch. Krauthammer
Lawrence Kudlow
Dr. Laura
John Leo
David Limbaugh
Michelle Malkin
Jackie Mason
Chris Matthews
Michael Medved
Kathleen Parker
Wes Pruden
Sam Schulman
Amity Shlaes
Roger Simon
Tony Snow
Thomas Sowell
Cal Thomas
Jonathan S. Tobin
Ben Wattenberg
George Will
Bruce Williams
Walter Williams
Mort Zuckerman

Consumer Reports

Let 'em know -- IN A Hallmark greetng card store last week, shopping for anniversary cards to give my wife, I found it impossible to read the sentiments in the cards because of the piped in audio throughout the store. Had it been innocuous instrumental music, there would have been no problem. Unfortunately what was coming over the speakers was a soft-rock radio station featuring pop/rock vocals in-between a fast talking DJ, public service announcements and numerous commercials.

For me, reading and comprehending sentimental poetry which conveys intimate expressions of undying love and devotion, deep understanding, and a lifetime of togetherness while listening to supermarket jingles and air traffic reports simply cannot be done. After a few minutes of trying, I put the cards back and was just standing there when a saleswoman approached.

"Can I help you with anything?" she asked expressionless.

I hesitated, deciding whether to tell her the truth (which I figured wouldnít make any difference), or give her my stock "no thank you" answer and just leave the store. I took a deep breath and decided to be honest.

"Well, Iíd like to make a minor complaint," I said.

Anticipating a confrontation with a trouble-maker, the saleswomanís expressionless face turned instantly into a frown. Stepping back away from me, she said, "what?"

I explained that the radio was causing a distraction in my attempt to read and choose greeting cards. She told me that I was the first and only person to ever complain about the radio. The inference is, of course, that in addition to being a trouble-maker, I am also an oddball and clearly in the wrong. I said nothing, but stood looking at her.

"Iíll tell my assistant manager," she said walking off.

Less then a minute later, a youngish woman with an air of authority appeared and asked if she could be of assistance. Once again, I explained my difficulty concerning the radio.

"Oh, Iíll turn it down," she said quickly and disappeared into the back room.

Soon the volume was lowered. It was better, I thought, but still intrusive. She then came out from the back, listened for a moment and as it turned out, came to the same conclusion as I had. She returned to the back room but this time changed the audio completely to non-obtrusive soothing background music. It was a pleasure.

I thanked her and went about my card selection. Ultimately I decided on three cards and brought them up front to the cash register. The first saleswoman was there and took my money without mentioning the earlier incident.

Before leaving the store I made it my business to locate the assistant manager and thank her again for being so accommodating. She smiled and said I was welcome. I left the store feeling pretty good.

So the moral of the story is: if you are in a restaurant or a store and something bothers you, donít just leave, make sure the people in charge know that there is a problem. It may make a difference. It did for me -- this time.

JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. You may contact him by clicking here.


01/30/01: One Final Trashing
01/26/01: Don't look in the mirror
01/19/01: He Got It His Way
01/12/01: Be cool ... be very cool
01/05/01: Whatís Next?
12/29/00: "Hi, I'm Megan And I'll Be Your Dealer This Evening."
12/23/00: A nice old-fashioned winter
12/15/00: A holiday carol for the Fat Lady
12/08/00: Vice president Queeg
12/01/00: Here we come a-caroling
11/23/00: Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
11/17/00: Goreís Desperation
11/10/00: It Ain't Over
11/03/00: Read this before you vote
10/27/00: Democratic Big Guns Shoot Blanks
10/20/00: Generation Duh
10/13/00: And the whiner is ...
10/06/00: The Vicious Hollywood Left
09/29/00: Pop Porn
09/22/00: Put On A Tie, Ya Bums!
09/15/00: A sneak peek at The William Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library
09/08/00: The Big Mooseketeer
09/01/00: In Honor of Those Who Never Were
08/25/00: Building a Bridge to the Sixties
08/22/00: Leaks
08/18/00: Sour Grapes
08/11/00: But heís Jewish!
08/04/00: Aint Nothiní But A Hound Dog
07/27/00: Trick or Treat
07/21/00: Another Golden Moment In Broadcasting
07/14/00: Who eats this, ahem, 'stuff'?
07/07/00: In Your Face Advertising
06/29/00: My Home Sweet Home
06/23/00: Hairs The Thing
06/13/00: The Sweetest Sounds
06/02/00: Another Opening, Another Show
05/22/00: What's next, The Million Mutt March?
05/19/00: Hail the Conquering Hero
05/12/00: Extra! Read All About It!
05/03/00: Clintonís Transparent Department of Duplicity and Demagoguery
04/24/00: For The Children?
04/19/00: Liars And Cowards And Bums, Oh My!
04/11/00: Gripe, Gripe, Gripe
04/05/00: Counting the Race Cards
03/30/00: Speed Bumps
03/22/00: The Eyes Have It
03/15/00: Academia and Media --- Theyíre Just Not Right
03/09/00: Sweat The Small Stuff -- Itís Okay
03/02/00: Actors And Other Animals
02/23/00: Campaign 2000 --- Wake Me When Its Over
02/15/00: Who Wants to be Regis Philbin?
02/08/00: Aftermath of a Tragedy
01/31/00: Ask Mr. Politically Correct Man
01/25/00: Iíd Like To Thank All The Little People
01/20/00: Merger Mania
01/11/00: Just Say JA-GWAAR
01/04/00: Who Was That Masked Man? My Hero!
12/28/99: New Millennium --- New Rules
12/21/99: Bubbaís Visit From Saint Nick
12/14/99: Call Me Mister
12/08/99: So Much Going On, So Little Time
11/30/99: Sunday Afternoon
11/22/99: The Best Money Canít Buy
11/15/99: My Peter Pan Generation
11/08/99: Fall Invasion
10/29/99: When my wife was young and Gay
10/22/99: Too Late for Dinner
10/15/99: Pondering, Musing and Supposing
10/05/99: A Message From Your Journalistic Human Interest Commentator
09/24/99: The Getting Away With It Decade
09/17/99: The Scoop of the Century
09/09/99: Important Millennium Advisory
09/03/99: Ask Mr. Politically Correct Man
08/26/99: Broadcasters, Please mind Your Manners
08/19/99: The Golden Age of Jerkdom
08/12/99: Dressing Down...and Out

© 2000, Greg Crosby