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Jewish World Review Oct. 27, 2000 / 28 Tishrei 5761

Greg Crosby

Greg Crosby
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Democratic Big Guns Shoot Blanks -- THE 2000 PRESIDENTIAL RACE is getting close to the wire with Gore and Bush heading for the finish line practically in a dead heat. The Democrats are scared, so naturally it’s time for them to pull out all the stops and, (in keeping with the credo of their loyal supporters, the trial lawyers) do whatever it takes to win. Yes, it’s time to haul out the big guns, the little guns and all the other guns in-between -- and the Democrats, in spite of their anti-gun stance, have a lot of these types of guns at their disposal. We’ve seen both big and small guns blasting away all over the media this past week.

CNN has certainly done it’s liberal best in working overtime to promote Gore-positive and Bush-negative stories on air including interviews with celebrity political “experts” who just happen to be on the Gore side.

Little Gun #1 One repulsive little gun to pop off lately has been Larry Flint, the porn king. Flint appeared on CNN accusing George W. Bush of having something to do with an abortion back in the 1970’s -- but when asked for details and additional information, he couldn’t supply it. The fact that Flint didn’t have any proof whatsoever to substantiate the slanderous charges he was making didn’t stop CNN from broadcasting this muckmeister all over the country. Not exactly Pulitzer prize winning journalism, I would say.

Little Gun #2 Following the last debate, a CNN show featured the scholarly insights of that world-famous political analyst, Roger Ebert (that’s right - the television movie critic).

No, I’m not kidding -- and clearly neither was Ebert. This was not done as a joke or gag bit, Ebert was deadly serious in his shallow put-downs and cliché-ridden slams of Gov. Bush. This is not to say that Mr. Ebert doesn’t have a right to his beliefs, he certainly does. But what makes a movie critic’s opinion of the presidential candidates any more valid than the guy who bags your groceries at the supermarket (or anyone else you might name for that matter)? The answer is, his opinion is not any more valid. But Ebert is a television personality and as such his views are broadcast to millions. The fact that he has no track record or experience as a political expert has nothing to do with it. And of course anything he says goes unchallenged. Another big thumbs down for CNN.

Little Gun #3 She’s ba-ack! Just when you thought it was safe to go into the trailer park, Paula Jones has returned. But if you think you know the name of that tune, think again. Paula is singing an entirely different song this time. Not only has she posed for a (suspiciously timed) nude photo spread in Penthouse Magazine, she’s appeared on CNN’s Larry King show claiming that she never really meant to get the President into any trouble. You see, it was those nasty ol’ wascally Republicans that made her do it. Poor, poor Paula. Will anyone ever believe anything she has to say again? It doesn’t matter -- CNN will give her air time.

The biggest gun of them all has finally been unleashed this week with Bill Clinton shifting from Middle East peace negotiator to partisan political attack dog. Presto-change-o! Bill’s been a busy guy lately, but he’ll always find time for a bit of good old political spinning. Just point him in the right direction and yell, “KILL!”

It appears to me that the Democrats have at last found an ingenious way to use Bill Clinton in this campaign while continuing to stress that Al Gore is his own man. Here’s how I believe it works: All the time Clinton is out there hammering Bush, word keeps “leaking” out from the Gore camp that Al is “not happy with what Clinton is doing” -- that he doesn’t want any help from the President. “Insiders” report that Gore has as much as told Clinton to “lay off!” Pretty clever. This way, the Dems get to play the Clinton card, while at the same time Gore appears to be a strong independently thinking man who is not afraid to buck the big guy. A sting operation worthy of Hollywood scriptwriters. No doubt a big thumb’s up from Roger Ebert.

Whether or not this scenario will play in the hearts of voters remains to be seen.

What effect all the Democratic guns will have in deciding this election is anyone’s guess. We’ll all find out soon enough. Until then, see you at the movies!

JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. You may contact him by clicking here.


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© 2000, Greg Crosby