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Jewish World Review Dec. 15, 2000 / 18 Kislev, 5761

Greg Crosby

Greg Crosby
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Consumer Reports

A holiday carol for the Fat Lady -- THE UNITED STATES SUPREME COURT has rendered its decision and it appears that 35 days after the election we have a president-elect. Al Gore, learning from his boss that one never, ever admits defeat even (or possibly especially) when it is obvious that you have lost, had finally run out of legal loopholes. He had no other choice but to make a concession speech which undoubtedly was the best speech of his political life. But you never know with these people. Even with all the conciliatory words uttered, I detected underlining negative cues which leave the door open to future confrontation. It wouldn't surprise me to find out that good ol' Al still has a couple of tricks up his earth-toned sleeve.

At the very least, look for sore loser liberals to do whatever they can to throw cold water on Bush festivities including the Presidential Inauguration. Jesse Jackson has already promised to lead demonstrations and marches across the country between January 15th through the 20th. That's right, if you can't win in the courts, take it to the streets.

To quote Jackson verbatim, "We will take to the streets right now, we will delegitimize Bush, discredit him, do whatever it takes, but never accept him."

I wonder if the Reverend is tone deaf or something, because I do believe that the fat lady has sung, as they say. And as a matter of fact, I happen to have the song she sung right here:

It's a lovely little holiday carol called "The Concession Song."
Sung to the tune of "The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire)"

Al Gore whining like a losing liar,
Jesse screemin' in the street.
Bags of chads being thrown in the fire,
And liberals not coping with defeat.
Isn't victory sweet?
A turkey like Joe Lieberman,
writes his third concession speech.
The Left will need a new leader when,
Big Al and Joe are out of reach.

They know that George is on his way,
He's bringing Cheney, Powell and Laura on his sleigh.
And every Democrat is going to cry,
To see Republicans in the White House by and by.

And so I'm offering this simple phrase,
To liberals across the USA.
Although it's been said many times, many ways,
It's all o-ver,
Completely o-ver,
It's really o-ver - o-kay?

Do you hear what I hear Rev? Listen to her Al. You can hear her, can't you Joe? Do you hear the fat lady Bill? No, Bill -- keep your hands off her, just listen to her sing. Now get out of here you knuckleheads and go quietly into that good night.
America wants to celebrate the holidays already!

JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. You may contact him by clicking here.


12/08/00: Vice president Queeg
12/01/00: Here we come a-caroling
11/23/00: Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
11/17/00: Gore’s Desperation
11/10/00: It Ain't Over
11/03/00: Read this before you vote
10/27/00: Democratic Big Guns Shoot Blanks
10/20/00: Generation Duh
10/13/00: And the whiner is ...
10/06/00: The Vicious Hollywood Left
09/29/00: Pop Porn
09/22/00: Put On A Tie, Ya Bums!
09/15/00: A sneak peek at The William Jefferson Clinton Presidential Library
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08/25/00: Building a Bridge to the Sixties
08/22/00: Leaks
08/18/00: Sour Grapes
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07/27/00: Trick or Treat
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04/05/00: Counting the Race Cards
03/30/00: Speed Bumps
03/22/00: The Eyes Have It
03/15/00: Academia and Media --- They’re Just Not Right
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02/23/00: Campaign 2000 --- Wake Me When Its Over
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01/31/00: Ask Mr. Politically Correct Man
01/25/00: I’d Like To Thank All The Little People
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12/21/99: Bubba’s Visit From Saint Nick
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10/29/99: When my wife was young and Gay
10/22/99: Too Late for Dinner
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09/09/99: Important Millennium Advisory
09/03/99: Ask Mr. Politically Correct Man
08/26/99: Broadcasters, Please mind Your Manners
08/19/99: The Golden Age of Jerkdom
08/12/99: Dressing Down...and Out

© 2000, Greg Crosby