Steve Young
Latest 'Correction' Could Bring Back "Emeril" and "Ellen"
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com -- IN an effort to reduce the pressure on the major television networks, Federal Reserve Chairman, Alan Greenspan, has announced a decrease in the level of viewer interest required for a prime time show to be considered a success.
"Not many people really care what kind of cr-p network television produces anymore." said Greenspan. "So if interest can't be raised, perhaps decreasing the need for that interest would add the spark networks need to survive."
With the major networks facing dwindling viewership, the rates they are able to charge advertisers have also suffered.
The editor of "TV Advertising, TV Advertising, TV Advertising Monthly," Thom Thinthith, said, "Soon television will be forced to charge advertisers what their advertising is actually worth, and that could be disastrous for the mom and pop billionaires who have their life savings tied up in the major networks."
Prior to leaving, ABC Entertainment President Stuart Bloomberg said, "The mistake we made was relying on the deficit viewership created by "So You Want To Be A Millionaire." That caused such long term debt in the quality of shows that which actually had to be written that it'll be years before we'll get people to turn off HBO." Immediately after making the statement, Bloomberg was summarily "stepped down'd."
The interest drop was the 35th decrease in the last 12 months.
"Personally, Andrea (Mitchell) and I loved 'Emeril' but what are you
going to do?" shrugged the enigmatic Greenspan.
JWR contributor Steve Young, Prism Award winner and Humanitas Prize nominee for his
television writing, is contributing editor at the Writers Guild of
America's "Written By" magazine. He is the author of the forthcoming "Great Failures Of
The Extremely Successful," Tallfellow Press, 2002
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