Jewish World Review Dec. 14, 2001 / 29 Kislev, 5762
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com -- While anyone who has access to a map of Afghanistan or knows what a cave is, is chasing the twenty-five million dollar prize hung on this particular satan's dome, the morticians' best friend himself, Dumber-than-a-llama-Osama seems to be after Vin d'bona's $10,000. first prize, or at least a shot on Animal Planet's, "America's Favorite Pets." Okay, it's not as funny as a dog "Pushing a rock. Pushing a rock," or some guy getting popped in his "sensitive areas" (gets me all the time). But it's sure to have more shock value.
Can you think of another reason why the brilliant mastermind of death and destruction, who has lead to death of so many Americans AND even more of his own people, would be so blithering stupid as to leave this smoking tape laying around for world-wide consumption?
It's like O.J. leaving his victims' blood on the steering wheel of his car. You just don't do that. You'll end up getting yourself convicted. I mean it.
Perhaps there's some more nefarious reason for what seems like a fatal blunder; for someone to be so absolutely sloppy with damning "evidence." I offer the following possibilities
1. It's some type of marketing move to get this 40 minute tape into a U.S. Film Festival as a short film entry
2. bin Laden is trying to show up Hitler.
4. He's using this as a dating tape for "After You've Written To Lifers, Try Us" escort service?
5. It's some kind of challenge to Johnny Cochran, which says, "You think you're so great? Try and get me off."
6. It's this a last ditch effort to nail down the Time Magazine Man Of The Year cover? Mad Magazine Man Of The Year
7. He wanted to send a message to potential Taliban soldiers reminding them that when you take on a job for Osama you'd better find out if there's an expiration date on your job description...and it's the same day as your job.
But no matter what the reason...even Bob Saget has more sense than to touch this one.
12/10/01: What if Catching bin Laden is in dispute?