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Jewish World Review May 4, 2001 / 11 Iyar, 5761
http://www.jewishworldreview.com --
USE a hammer on a piece
of glass, and it shatters. Use it
to drive a nail through steel,
and you get nowhere. To
influence a child, you need to
know what he's made of, and
be prepared with a full tool-box
of approaches.
Rabbi Avraham Pam, shlita, dean of Yeshiva Torah Vodaath in Brooklyn, was
recently greeted at a simcha, lifecycle event,
by a man in his mid-60s, who
reminded him of an incident
long past. The man was a student,
and Rabbi Pam was proctoring
an important exam.
Observing that this student
was straining to see his
neighbor's paper, Rabbi Pam
instantly understood what
was needed, and was prepared
with the right response. He
stated simply, "My son, if
you're having trouble reading
the questions, I'll be glad to
read them for you."
"Your kind and loving
manner changed my life,"
the man told Rabbi Pam. "I
was then an unsettled teen,
and floundering. Instead of
embarassing me, you gave me
the needed push to succeed."
Adapted from Rabbi Yakov
Horowitz’s tape series, "Reazlizing
Your Parenting Potential," with
permission from the speaker
Personal Growth
THE ROYAL SMILE
Our forefrather Jacob gave his son
Yehudah (Judah) the blessing that
he should be "red-eyed from
wine and white-toothed
from milk." The late Rabbi Avigdor
Miller, ZT"L, explains
that these words can
also
mean that the
gift of white teeth—a
smile —brings
more important
sustenance
to the body
than milk
does. And
this life-sustaining
gift benefits
the one
who smiles
as much as
the one who
receives the
smile.
The question
arises, then,
as to why this gift
is given specifically
to Yehudah. To
this question,
Rabbi Mund
of Montreal
answers
that, because
Yehudah was
destined to produce
Israel's
kings, his smile held special
power and importance.
What could serve a king better
than a smile that
delights the hearts of his
subjects and makes them
feel loved and valued by
their leader?
Each of us is the "leader"
to someone. Our children,
our students, employees,
even our younger brothers
and sisters look to us for
approval and
warmth --- the feelings
conveyed in one
powerful flash
through a sincere
smile.
We need
not go to
great
lengths to
imagine
the feeling
of a student when
the principal
greets him with a
smile, or of an
employee when his boss
shows a friendly face.
Everyone has a piece of
Yehudah's blessing, and the
power to use it within our
own individual "realms,"
each and every day.
Inner Excellence
THE GOOD WAY
Rabban Yochanan ben
Zakkai, in Pirkei Avos, tells
his five students to go out
into the world and determine
"which is
the good way
to which man
should cling."
Each was
impressed by a
different trait
which he felt
was the key to
one's ability to
live a religious life. This
is the fourth of a
five-part series
examining these traits.
Said Rabbi Shimon:
Seeing What Lies Ahead
Does this mean that,
according to Rabbi Shimon,
one needs the power to predict
the future in order to
live a Torah -- religious -- life? The
Talmud explains the verse
as the ability to consider
the consequences of one's
actions. Rashi adds that this
entails taking precautions
to prevent negative consequences.
Rav Yaakov
Weinberg,
the late dean of
Baltimore's
Ner Israel rabbinical college,
expounds on
this thought.
He points out
that Pharaoh
elevated Joseph,
a Hebrew slave,
above all his
ministers.
What quality did Joseph have that led Pharaoh to
believe he alone could save
Egypt from starvation during
the oncoming famine?
Joseph not only looked
ahead; he faced the future
and acted upon it. "And now
let Pharaoh seek an understanding,
wise man..." Yoseph said. Now, today, while the
crops are still plentiful.
A person who thinks
ahead to future needs and
acts upon them now is one
who can guide his family,
his business, his community
and his own life with
patience, good judgment
and success. Rather than
being trapped by the limited
options of a crisis situation,
he can consider a wide
range of actions and outcomes.
And with the help of
the Creator, he can choose "the
good way."
Adapted from "There Shall Be Light," By Rabbi Yitzchak M. Goodman, with permission from
Targum Press
The right tools
Chosen Words, a newsletter of spiritual and personal growth, is produced by the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation. Comment by clicking here.
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