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Jewish World Review Nov. 28, 2000 / 30 Mar-Cheshvan, 5761
http://www.jewishworldreview.com --
THE FAMOUS Rabbi Zusia
was a Torah scholar who lived
in constant pain and dire
poverty, yet he expressed no
discontent at his lot. Once
someone asked him, "How
can you say the brachah, blessing,
thanking the Creator for fulfilling
all your needs when you
obviously have so many
needs unmet?" To that, Rabbi
Zusia explained, "G-d has a
much better understanding
of my needs than I do, and He
understands that poverty is
one of my needs."
Much unhappiness in life
derives from unmet expectations.
"I deserve a night's
sleep, a better job, more cooperation
from my children ..."
Such thoughts fuel the anger
and resentment that obscure
all the good one does have.
But Reb Zusia understood that
what one has is what one
needs, whether we see it or
not. By working to implant
this understanding in our
own hearts, we earn for ourselves
the greatest possession
of all —peace of mind.
Adapted from “Dearer Than
Life,” by Rabbi Abraham J.
Twerski, M.D., with permission
from Shaar Press
Inner Excellence
FOCUSING ON SPIRITUAL
GROWTH PUTS
Since worrying cannot
alter the outcome of a situation,
it makes sense to channel
your thought processes
into a more helpful, uplifting
direction.
When worries are about
money, the best tactic is to
rechannel your thoughts
toward spiritual rather than
material needs. When you
recognize that material possessions
are only tools to
serve spiritual needs, and
that the Creator supplies all
your spiritual needs,
your sense
of deprivation
fades.
Whatever
you don't
have is
something
that
G-d
has determined you don't
need to achieve your spiritual
purposes. A wise man
said, "Almighty, all my worrying
about my failings in
serving You properly has
removed me from all other
worries." (Sefer Hamidos
Lehameiri).
We are even capable of
redirecting our thoughts
regarding the ultimate
human worry—death. Our
thoughts can transform that
passage from one of debilitating
anxiety into our
greatest act of submission to
the Creator—a total relinquishment
of ourselves into His
care. In doing so, even death
becomes elevating.
Suggestion: Take one particular
worry that preoccupies
your mind, and determine
that whenever your find
yourself ruminating about it,
you will instead "worry"
about how best to perform a
mitzvah —for example, honoring elders, engaging in kindness, prayer.
A REASSURING MENTAL
IMAGE CAN HELP
Oh, the
relief of shifting your burden
to these ample shoulders and
letting this hero make all the
decisions.
In fact, this isn't a dream.
Everything is under control.
If we were able to see
His hand managing
each aspect of our lives, we
would never worry. But since
this is beyond our perception,
we rely on emunah — faith in
G-d. A person imbued with
emunah can be as relaxed
under stress
as the person
saved by
our imaginary
super-hero.
Beneath
the details
of any particular
worry is the
concern that "something bad
is going to happen." Whether
it's poverty, an unhappy marriage,
illness or emotional
pain, our worry stems from
anticipation of this suffering.
But beneath the workings of
emunah is a fundamental
belief that G-d is good. He
may test us, He may prod us to
grow through means we ourselves
wouldn't choose. But no
"bad" can come from His
hand. The good is there for us
to see, if not in this world, then
in the next. With the Creator, our
"Hero," in charge, we truly
have nothing to fear.
Try It: If you feel yourself
being overwhelmed by worry,
replay the scene of the "hero"
in your mind as a prompt to
remind yourself that everything
really is under
control.
Adapted from "Gateway to Happiness,"
by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin
with permission from the author
Personal Growth
EDUCATION THAT STICKS
Every parent has ideas about what middos (character traits) they
believe are important to develop in their child.
But the Torah teaches us
that if we want our values to
stick, and stay with the
child for
life, they
have to fit
with the
child's
nature. One
child loves
numbers,
another
loves action,
and another
loves words.
Chances are,
he always will.
The verse in Proverbs
tells us, "Educate the child
according to his way, for
when he grows old he will
not depart from it."
Rabbi Shlomo Breuer
explains that the final word,
"it," refers back to "his way,"
meaning the child's
nature. If we make it
our business as parents
to discover our
children's personalities
and inclinations,
and work at
channeling
those strengths
in proper
directions, we
will succeed,
because they
will not, as
adults, depart
from their
own inclinations.
If, on the
other hand, we
try to mold
them into
something
they're not,
they'll flee
from that path
as soon as they
are able.
Adapted from "Rabbi Frand in Print,"
by Rabbi Yissachar Frand
with permission from Mesorah Publications,
Real Needs
YOUR WORRIES
INTO PERSPECTIVE
YOU FEEL THE CREATOR'S PROTECTION
It's the dream of anyone
faced with a crisis: Someone
should walk through the door
with an air
of kindness,
competence
and calm, and
announce,
"Don't worry.
I'm here
now. Everything's
under control."
Chosen Words, a newsletter of spiritual and personal growth, is produced by the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation. Comment by clicking here.
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