Q: A woman who works for me dresses in a provocative fashion. We work in a formal professional setting.
I get complaints from co-workers that her flesh-baring outfits are distracting and unprofessional. She recently wore a black lace dress with her cleavage showing and I blurted: "Boy, you're dressed up for a Monday!" Her response was that she had a date that night.
I contacted Human Resources, and their response was for me to handle it.
I know you're not meant to comment on appearances, and this is a touchy topic. Help!
ANSWER : So touchy, apparently, that even HR won't go near it with a four-inch stiletto.
One would think a "professional" workplace should be managed as such, with written dress codes and HR teams trained to facilitate difficult conversations in a diplomatic way. Leaving frustrated managers to "handle it" is how companies end up slapped with discrimination lawsuits.
I realize you were caught off guard, but your euphemistic reaction to your subordinate's outfit may have been misinterpreted as a compliment. She wasn't "dressed up for a Monday"; she was dressed for something other than work, the same as if she had showed up outfitted for an after-hours gym workout or riding lesson. Whether it's lace and décolletage or spurs and jodhpurs, she's sending the sartorial signal that her focus is somewhere besides work.
Bottom line: Her character was costumed for a different scene. (Even centuries ago, when I was moonlighting as a professional belly dancer, I knew enough to save the sequined belt and arm bangles for after work.)
If your company doesn't have a written dress code consistent with the ambiance it wants to create - or if it relies on vague, subjective terms like "professional" and "appropriate" - management has only itself to blame when employees apply their own interpretations. One person's scandalous workplace distraction is another's right to bare arms.
Dress codes sometimes have to get specific about details, both what is preferred - collared shirts, covered shoulders and collarbones, full-length pants - and what is prohibited, such as visible undergarments, ripped clothing, denim or flip-flops. If your code isn't that specific, it may be time to urge HR to make it so.
The good news is that most U.S. workplaces have the perfect excuse for issuing a general announcement: "As summer brings record-high temperatures to our area, we have a few reminders on staying cool while maintaining our company's business-formal environment."
You say she often dresses provocatively - a subjective term, but I'll take your word for it. It could be intentional or unconscious. Or - as I've written about before - it's the result of women's clothing retailers constantly blurring the lines between workwear and evening wear in cuts designed for a limited range of body types. At any rate, a broad hint from management may not land with her the way a private one-on-one conversation would.
But addressing this with her individually runs the risk of implying that her personal taste makes her a "bad culture fit," which is often code for being too different from the demographic in charge. The goal is to have her dress more conservatively without making her feel judged or singled out. The irony is that she's already being judged and singled out and may well be aware of that. So you need to be careful about how you word the changes that you would like to see her make.
I recommend that you go back and enlist HR's aid in scripting and delivering a brief, straightforward request for your subordinate to start dressing more conservatively. You might remind HR that the more guidance they provide you, the less likely you'll be to inadvertently blurt something that could end up creating even more work for them.
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Reader 2: I have worked as an administrator at a private university for about 20 years. The university is instituting a "salary architecture" plan that would cap salaries they deem outside the market range. Since I have worked many years in the same role, I fear I'll be one of those who'll no longer receive base salary increases. Do I have any recourse? Can they legally and retroactively change a person's role to one with a salary maximum? This will affect my retirement plan matching, too. I am at least 15 years from retirement. I love my job, but I can't imagine being happy with no raise for the foreseeable future.
Karla: Unfortunately, unless you have a contract that says otherwise, private employers can change your salary pretty much any time. Sometimes, during especially tight economic times, they may even ask highly paid employees to accept a pay cut. Cuts and caps can be a tool to encourage voluntary attrition or nudge out senior employees to make room for cheaper replacements - or they may be a good-faith effort to develop fair and consistent pay scales in workplaces with a history of arbitrary compensation practices.
I have no idea which one is the case here. If the changes seem to be primarily aimed at a particular demographic regardless of job category - women or older workers, for example - it might be worth a conversation with an employment lawyer. But if the suffering is being more or less evenly distributed, and leadership is being transparent about the changes, it may just be a painful but necessary belt-tightening.
That said, even though a capped salary is much better than a pay cut or layoff, I can't imagine being thrilled about facing a decade-plus with no raises, either, however much I liked my work. It might not hurt to research what similar private and public universities are offering for someone in your position; you might discover you're better off by comparison. If you decide to stay put, consider whether there are nonmonetary perks you could ask for that would make that pay restriction chafe a little less, such as shorter workdays or extra time off.
(COMMENT, BELOW)
Previously:
• Why won't my old employer hire me back?
• An old co-worker is back and publicizing my cringey history
• Your questions about the Paycheck Protection Program and furloughs
• How to cope with colleague you resent
• Resumes: Getting past the electronic gatekeeper

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