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Some of the greatest pleasures of our marriage were the road trips that Jane and I took during our 47 years together. Beginning with Route 49, the gold rush route we took soon after we were married, we explored our great country and experienced first-hand places we had always heard of, but never before saw.
I drove the car and Jane was navigator and keeper of our daily log. She loved reading road maps and charting our course, keeping me informed on where a good stop for lunch might be, and where we might spend the night. She took photos out of the car window of every interesting site. Everything seemed so exciting, so fresh, mirroring our marriage and new life together. We had embarked on a lifetime of adventures, literally.
Our adventure continued through the years, we made several cross country trips, all the trips to many of our national parks and forests, trips up the California coast many times on many different routes, trips through the southwest, the Midwest, the northwest, including historic trips to the Alamo, the Little Big Horn, revolutionary and civil war towns, southern plantations, Williamsburg, Harper's Ferry, Mount Vernon, Tombstone, Arizona, and many presidential libraries. Sometimes we didn't drive, we took the train and had wonderful times on those adventures too. Thanks to my job we also traveled to many countries around the world. But the road trips remained our favorites.
Our road trip adventures stopped when Jane's health got so bad that it became impossible to travel any distance. Then, on top of many other things, she lost her eyesight and was blind for the last eight years of her life. But my wife was still willing to get away with me, if even for only a night or so. We attempted it two times but it was no good. Jane not being able to see anything or contribute in any way made it frustrating and sad for us both. My poor wife was trying to do it just to make me happy, I'm sure.
The love of my life, my sweet beautiful wife, Jane, has been gone more than 14 months now, and I haven't been on any road trips since her death. The idea of going anywhere without her is unthinkable because the road trips were never about going to see places, they were about going to places together. Jane and I being together, having adventures together.
Well, guess what? I went on a road trip this week. My brother's youngest son, Max, was graduating from Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo on Sunday so my sister Debra and I drove up to be there. It's just over 200 miles away, about a 3 hour drive from where I live. Debra (whose husband had passed away only a few months ago) suggested that we go up together and stay at a place she has in Pismo Beach, just a short 15 minutes from the university. We left on Friday morning and got back on Monday.
Yes, I went but my initial response was not to go. But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed the right thing to do, for many reasons. I knew that getting out of my house for a few days would be healthy for me. I also realized that not going to Max's commencement would be a selfish act on my part. This is a happy family event and I should be a part of it, for everyone's sake including my own. So, okay Debra, let's go.
We had a wonderful time. Staying with my sister was fun and comfortable. We laughed, walked around a little, did a jigsaw puzzle, and even went to the movies. And being with my brother Brian and his family for this joyous occasion was just exactly what I needed. I am so grateful to have family around me. Jane would have been so happy to have been there, of course, but I went up there for both of us. So in a way, our adventure has continued. I am so glad to have had another road trip, and one so memorable.
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