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"Wow, you're all dressed up! Where are you going?" Comments such as these have been made to me from time to time regarding my appearance. It happens often and I'm never quite sure how to respond. So the question is, what do I look like? How exactly am I dressed, you might wonder. Am I wearing a suit and tie? Not hardly. Not even close. Generally I am wearing chinos, a clean and pressed shirt tucked into my trousers, and a pair of loafers or sometimes those soft boat shoes called Topsiders. All dressed up, right?
These remarks come not from people who know me well, and not usually from total strangers either, but from people of whom I'm acquainted but don't see that often. I'm fairly certain that these remarks are not meant in any sort of condescending or disrespectful way. The comments are, I believe, simply made as a complement. A way of saying "You look very nice." And I always take it that way, even though the question as to why am I "all dressed up?" begs an answer. Uncomfortably, I am put into a position in which I must explain myself.
"Oh," I say with a sheepish grin, "I'm not going anywhere special." That is my usual response and it always feels weak and sad. But I offer it up, putting me in that awful corner of having to have an explanation for my choice of clothing. I've given an excuse for the way I look, and it's a poor excuse too, since I've let on that I am not dressed for anything special nor that I'm headed for anywhere in particular. In effect, I'm saying "I have nowhere to go and no particular reason why I look this way." I almost feel as if I should apologize.
I've noticed that no one ever asks the guy in the baggy shorts, grungy T-shirt and worn out sneakers why he's dressed the way he is. Nobody says, "Wow, you're not dressed very nicely. Where are you going, to a dumpster dive?" No, this guy is given a free pass. He's not given the 3rd degree and expected to have an excuse for his appearance. But I, on the other hand, must have a logical reason why I look the way I look, I must explain where I'm going, and show 2 forms of I.D., a birth certificate, and a green card.
Once in a while I might venture to wear (hold on!) a blazer over my chinos and, as you might imagine, that really shakes people up. I'm sure people think I'm going to a formal wedding or attending some important, gala opening event or on the way to a private meeting with the president or the CEO of a multi-billion dollar corporation. I mean, why else would I be wearing a sportscoat?
I wonder if my inquiring acquaintances believe that when I'm home alone I walk around "all dressed up" in freshly ironed chinos and a crisp shirt and well shined penny loafers. They would be shocked to know that I don't. Dressing that way at home would be a bit much wouldn't you say?
Actually when by myself in the privacy of my home I put on a three piece suit, a white dress shirt and tie and wear a pair of highly shined cap toe lace ups. Sometimes, if I'm so inclined, I might even throw on a double-breasted tuxedo or maybe white tie and tails. After all, you never know who could be dropping by for an aperitif and hors d'Oeuvre. Sad to say, nobody ever drops in. And I still have no place to go. But if I ever do have a special place to go, at least I'm dressed for it.
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