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Here's something you undoubtedly never thought about.
Some months of the year get all the glory. What the heck is he talking about, I can hear you saying to yourselves. Well I'll tell you. Let's, take February, for example. It starts with Groundhog Day. Good ol' Punxsutawney Phil is the star of the show that day, keeping us all in suspense waiting to find out if he'll see his shadow or not. Does anybody really give a rat's rump if he does or not? Probably not, but nevertheless, it's a yearly event.
After that, February gives us the Superbowl, another major event that not everybody cares about, but everybody waits for. Athletic stars show their stuff as viewers stuff their faces with nachos, chips and dips, Buffalo wings, and various other finger friendly foods that are not so good for us. Good or not, viewers shovel it down their gullets as they watch the game that gives them permission for eating this stuff.
February is the month glorifying yet another star, Cupid. Actually the stars of that day are not athletes, or groundhogs, or even Cupid. The real stars of the day are the ladies. Yes, Valentine's Day is the day most girls and women wait for. It's the day that most boys and men are pulled into celebrating by the ladies in their lives whether they want to or not. Valentine's Day is about love. And the guys show their love and devotion by adorning their loved ones with flowers, candy, and jewelry. Lots of jewelry, right girls?
February features the birthdays of three major presidents, George Washington, the Father of our Country, Abraham Lincoln, the Father of the Emancipation Proclamation, and Ronald Reagan, the Father of Maureen, Ron, Michael, and Patty.
And if you need another couple of February dates, you could throw in Tu Bishvat, and Ash Wednesday, for good measure.
January has a few important dates, like New Year's Day, Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, and Greg Crosby's birthday. December is another month filled to the brim with festive days. As a matter of fact, every single month of the year has at least one or two important dates attached to them. Every single month that is, but one. August. Poor August, nothing important has ever happened in August. As a matter of fact, August is so insignificant that most European countries take the entire month off for vacations.
In keeping with fairness to August, I think we need to help that poor month. We should give August a reason for being, besides just an excuse for Europe to go on vacation. August needs some important dates. So I did a little due diligence and guess what? I discovered that there are already many holidays and observances in August that already exist. Here are a few:
Homemade Pie Day on August 1st. Sounds good to me, but really, how many people want to bake a pie in the middle of a hot summer? For those brave souls who do, bless them. And save a slice for me. On that same date we have National Raspberry Cream Pie Day. That's the flavor to bake I guess.
August 2nd is National Ice Cream Sandwich Day. Goes well with the pies.
August 3rd is Big Forehead Day. It's also Clean Your Floors Day. One has nothing to do with the other. I don't think so. Can you combine both, like clean your big forehead? But if you're waiting for that one day a year to clean your floors, shame on you.
The list actually goes on and on, with special days (some stupid, some not so stupid) for every day in August. All of it is amusing, but not all that important. August still needs a real legitimate special day, like a federal holiday of some sort. Maybe if we had a mass write-in campaign to Washington they might institute one. Now, let's see…what might the federal government approve of for a new Federal Holiday? Maybe National Pay Your Income Tax Early Day? Never mind. Better to leave well enough alone.
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