Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

The Hollywood Reporter cited box office statistics revealing that attendance at movie theaters has dropped by eighty percent during the past three years. On the brighter side, it was reported last week that the film Rust has been rescheduled for production. Alec Baldwin said he's glad to get another shot.

• The Women of the View made Halloween news last Friday when irrepressible co-host Joy Behar claimed with total conviction that in the past she has enjoyed carnal relations with ghosts. However that is not completely true. Joy did have sex with several guys who then immediately took their own lives.

• The University of Wisconsin police are investigating how nude photos of the women's volleyball team became circulated online. And the girls are all stunners. I watched their last game on ESPN 2 which was marred by a wrist injury, however the doctor says it'll heal and I should be okay by next week.

• Fox Nation is promoting an in-house drama the network staged of a mock trial for Hunter Biden that highlights his video that showed him smoking crack with strippers. I suppose the deepest lesson to learn here is, never feed your demons, it only strengthens them. If anything, give them pizza and beer.

• USA Travel forecasts heavy domestic tourism travel across the U.S. this autumn. It's great for me to get out of L.A. a few days and enjoy the real America. Last week, entering an old barbecue joint in downtown Vegas, I asked the hostess if they serve crackers and she sighed and said, we'll serve anybody.

• Apple is reported to have revived its Project Titan to develop a fully autonomous vehicle and has hundreds of employees working on the driverless car labeled Project Titan. But it must be said that the project is nothing new. Apple has been creating driverless cars ever since they introduced the iPhone.

• President Biden appeared to open the gates for other Democrats in 2024 Friday when he hesitated a little too long before refusing to say if he'll run for re-election. I've seen this act a hundred times in Vegas. After the economy obeys Joe's order to get inside the coffin he closes the lid and saws it in half.

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• Just Stop Oil protestors in London were imprisoned Friday after spray-painting the front windows of Harrod's department store orange, demanding an end to oil. My morbid guess is that five minutes into their first prison shower, these guys will be screaming for oil. You've never seen such a turn around.

• Centers for Disease Control Director Rochelle Walensky contracted Covid last week only a week after she'd gotten another booster vaccine shot. Pfizer insists they pre-tested the vaccine to see if it worked on people, in fact they tested it on six billion people. They didn't just test it on the eight hamsters

• The New York Times cited racist remarks by L.A.'s Hispanic City Council president and blamed it on white people. The newspaper said racial prejudice is something newly-arrived Hispanics pick up from white people. I think it's another example of immigrants doing the jobs that Americans refuse to do.

• The DEA says the influx of drugs at the U.S. southern border is stretching thin DEA and Customs manpower making it easier to smuggle at U.S. international ports. Interpol just estimated that fifty percent of all shipments of pineapples contain cocaine. L.A. finally agrees that pineapple belongs on pizza.

• Kevin Spacey was jubilant last week after a judge threw out a decades-old inappropriate touching-of-a- waiter case against him. Our society has become extremely litigious. Last year I went duck hunting and I used a duck mating call, and today three of the ducks are suing me for sexual harassment.

• The Wall Street Journal quoted a survey on social media usage in the U.S. which found that three hundred and two million Americans are on social media now. That's ninety percent. The most used is Facebook. When I die I want my tombstone to have free Wi-Fi, that way people will visit me more often.

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