Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• President Trump upset many by meeting with the communist Mayor Mamdani in New York. Maybe he needed a laugh. I saw a photo of Bernie Sanders, Abdul Sayeed, and Mayor Mamdani together and it reminded me that the Marx Brothers were so much funnier when they were Groucho, Chico and Harpo.

• Iran's peace offer was rejected by Trump Saturday because they demanded the return of billions in frozen capital and an end to sanctions before they talk. Buildings all over Teheran now display banners that read Kill Trump!They purchased these banners from an online store based in Minneapolis.

• Scotland Yard and U.S. intelligence thwarted a terrorist attack on a U.S. air base in England. Five men were pulled over in three vans and arrested before they could reach the base. There would have been 6 men arrested but I wasn't in England to tell a joke identifying those arrested being Muslims.

• President Trump is working on federal approval to build an Arch de Trump in Washington, D.C., this next year. It's a good thing there's only one arch not two, or everyone would call it the Arch de McDonald's. To honor McDonald's Trump wants a sign over his arch to read Over 10 Million Deported.

• Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas shareholders approved a private investor's $17.6 billion takeover bid to take it private. A weekend in Vegas makes me feel like both Trump and Biden. I roll into town bragging and acting like a rich high roller and three days later, I can't remember where I parked my car.

• The Weather Channel reports a violent warm water storm slammed the East Coast on Saturday with high winds and rain. The West Coast was also under a strong tropical storm warning. It appears that El Nino is just the latest Mexican food this summer to give it to the American people from both ends.

• New Jersey flooded Saturday after taking the brunt of the Atlantic rainstorm that walloped the Eastern Seaboard last weekend. Flood rescue workers had to work their way very carefully around the uninhabited pine forest in South New Jersey. It is against state law to disturb a Mafia burial ground.

• UN Ambassador Mike Waltz said the U.S. rejected Iran's offer to negotiate an end to the war last week because Iran wanted sanction relief and access to billions before they talk. Nancy Pelosi had a scare. She thought she heard somebody say we may need to put boobs on the ground after the election.

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