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• Fox Weather showed video Monday of beachgoers saving a beached shark and dragging it back in the water by its tail. However in the same week a British man was killed by a shark in Australia while on his honeymoon. Reports say he didn't suffer for too long as he'd only been married for six days.
• Taylor Swift rocked the NFL Sunday when she showed up in Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City seated next to Travis Kelce's mother to root for her new boyfriend who's the star tight end for the Chiefs. I can already guess with certainty the theme of the break-up song. He watches too much football.
• The New York Post reported on Tuesday that President Biden's two-year-old German Shepherd named Commander bit a Secret Service agent Monday. It was the eleventh time the dog bit someone in the White House. It definitely sounds like the dog is finding the cocaine before the Secret Service does.
• Justin Trudeau apologized for personally leading two standing ovations in Canada's parliament for a 98-year-old Ukrainian World War II veteran officer after Zelensky's speech Friday. It turns out he served in a Nazi SS unit. The incident was so embarrassing nobody noticed Trudeau's black face.
• Target is closing all its stores in Harlem, San Francisco, Portland and Seattle due to retail theft and mob looting. They can't survive with marauding gangs invading and stealing everything and getting away with it. Ask any Indian tribe that used to live in Harlem, San Francisco, Portland or Seattle.
• The White House played down polls Monday showing President Biden is in serious trouble with voters in next year's election. The ABC News poll reveals inflation in the number-one concern. With food prices so high, we had to raise the three-second rule to ten seconds on the food we drop on the floor.
• President Biden flew to Detroit Tuesday where he stumbled and almost fell down the stairs while exiting Air Force One on the short stairs in the back of the plane. He went there to walk the picket line with autoworkers. He told the story about the days he worked on the assembly line with Henry Ford.
• Hunter Biden decided to sue the IRS which could inadvertently expose his father in the pre-trial discovery process to influence-peddling charges. Hunter's sober two years and he's about to learn what I did. The greatest day of my life was the day I discovered I don't need alcohol in order to make poor decisions.
• House Republicans face a Saturday deadline to avoid shutting down the government and laying off all federal employees. The last time Congress shut down the U.S. government, families living in Washington, D.C. were torn apart. And that was just from the tigers that escaped from the National Zoo.
• The ABC News poll showed Trump a ten point lead over Biden prompting celebrities to vow to move to Canada, New Zealand or Australia if he wins. It never fails. Whenever celebrities signal their refusal to live under Trump's racist America, they always threaten to move to the White Dominions.
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