Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

Buckingham Palace announced Friday the funeral for Queen Elizabeth II will be held at historic St. Paul's Cathedral in London Monday. Her long reign endeared herself to the English-speaking world. Elizabeth was one of the last living people to witness the Dallas Cowboys winning a Super Bowl.

• Netflix announced they will observe a filming hiatus on episodes of The Crown in respect for Queen Elizabeth's passing last week and will resume shooting after the mourning period. In addition Netflix will produce a movie about how Charles made it to the throne. It's called Two Weddings and a Funeral.

• King Charles addressed the Accession Council Saturday and signed orders witnessed by William the newly created Prince of Wales. In the wake of loss is the current of public excitement over a new royal era. In his first official command King Charles ordered Alexa to play the theme to The Jeffersons.

• President Biden and first lady Jill paid an official visit to the British Embassy in Washington, D.C., on Friday to sign the register of condolences to the people of Great Britain. Biden addressed reporters and he expressed his sadness about the death of the Queen. Joe said he really liked Bohemian Rhapsody.

• King Charles was affirmed as monarch by the Accession Council in St. James Palace on Saturday and the king ordered cannons in Hyde Park to fire ninety-six rounds to honor his mother's long life of world service. The U.S. joined the salute. Chicago gangs that night fired ninety-six shots into each other.

• President Biden told the press Friday he will attend the Queen's funeral in London. Biden's administration reacted characteristically to the Queen's death. Last night the FBI raided Mar-a-Lago to search for any evidence proving that Trump colluded with Russia to smother Queen Elizabeth with a My Pillow.

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• Democratic governors jumped on the California bandwagon calling for mandatory electric cars in their states by 2035. I see where this is going. Within two years, I won't be allowed to charge my EV for 28 days because the dashboard reads I posted a joke on Facebook that violated community standards.

• The Wall Street Journal reported that Democratic Party hopes for the fall election will hinge upon how they can sell likely Republican policies as harmful to single women and minorities. The clock is ticking. Scientists just warned that humanity could run out of things to call racist in as little as six weeks.

• The Palm Beach Post reports that the Kennedy winter family mansion on Ocean Avenue just sold for seventy million dollars. It's where Jack, Bobby. Teddy and old Joe played around to their heart's content. The mansion bears witness to the fact that adultery is a sport that's bigger than any one athlete.

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