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• The New York Post reported the Mega Millions lottery winning ticket was sold in Florida to one person who is set to collect the jackpot amount of one billion five hundred thousand dollars. We all know the jackpot disbursement rules. Half the money goes to taxes, and ten percent goes to the Big Guy.
• The Pentagon tried to downplay the explosive testimony of a Pentagon whistleblower who told Congress the U.S. has in custody crashed alien ships and alien creature remains. I have no trouble believing in the existence of alien creatures who look to be from outer space. I've been to the state fair.
• The American Bowling Congress lost a popular tournament site Thursday when the Pickwick Bowling Lanes in Burbank closed after sixty-two years. That's where a wise guy once recognized me and asked me if I knew Jesus' full name. I dropped the bowling ball on his foot and he got all three right.
• The Wall Street Journal reported that Amazon stock is up sixty-three percent this year, praising Amazon's improvement in services and giving people what they want. As an example, Amazon will start delivering packages to homes using drone aircraft. That's SO cool, skeet shooting with prizes.
• New York Mayor Eric Adams declared a state of emergency Thursday over the city's incoming flood of migrants that are spilling out of shelters and lined up sleeping on the sidewalks. The inconvenience is intolerable. Shoplifters running down the streets with flat screens did not sign up for the high hurdles.
• The State Department announced a prisoner swap with Iran's government Thursday in which the Iranians agree to free five U.S prisoners while the U.S. releases seven Iranian prisoners. You can't make it up. The U.S. government can't even pull off a prisoner swap without running up a forty percent deficit.
• Donald Trump's lawyers tried to delay the proposed January 3rd trial date for the January 6th charge which would be followed by the hush money trial in March followed by the documents trial in May. It changes nothing. If Biden can win from the basement Trump can win from the witness stand.
• The House Republicans released records showing that the Bidens received twenty million dollars from overseas in 2014. Hunter hustled up the twenty million. It's the most money an American has made while stoned out of his mind since Dr. Hunter S. Thompson wrote Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.
• President Biden informed the Weather Channel that he'd like to halt all oil drilling in federal waters off the East Coast, off the West Coast and in the Gulf of Mexico. That would only add to the current misery at the pump. Gas prices again are so high even the Corona Virus has stopped traveling.
• Forbes forecasts record business in Las Vegas this fall as Sin City continues to add hotel rooms, new showrooms, discos, restaurants and attractions. The huge South Point Hotel and Casino is now offering curbside service. You call ahead and they'll come out and take your money right from your car.
• The Richard Nixon Presidential Library and Museum in Yorba Linda, California, on Wednesday marked the forty-ninth anniversary of Nixon's resignation from the presidency. He's grown in public esteem. President Nixon once famously declared he was not a crook, and he wasn't by today's standards.
• The Washingtonian magazine posted a list of the twenty-nine best things for tourists to do and see while visiting the nation's capital this holiday month. Last week while I was in Washington D.C., I got to watch a movie triple feature of Blow, Boogie Nights and Scarface. The White House tours are incredible.
• Special Counsel Jack Smith filed motions to try to stop Trump from discussing his prosecution in contesting the 2020 election. Is this smart? If the Democrats force Trump to stop talking about 2020, he might start talking about inflation, crime and the border and they will have elected him a second time.
• President Biden spoke at a wind turbine factory in New Mexico Wednesday where Joe continued sounding the climate change alarm. I've seen this issue grow ever since oil men stopped donating to Democrats fifty years ago. I've concluded that climate change is the number-one cause of documentaries.
• President Biden's mind wandered into space Tuesday and told the Weather Channel he's spent three hundred seventy-six billion dollars on a facility that controls the climate. Get this man a white Persian cat to pet on his lap. It sounds like Joe's decided to spend his post presidency as a Bond villain.
• President Biden stated we are in a climate emergency in an interview he granted to the Weather Channel Wednesday. This was a smart PR move by Joe. To add credence to his claim that he only talked to Hunter's business partners about the weather, he only gives interviews to the Weather Channel.
• President Biden wrapped up his tour of Arizona, New Mexico and Utah Thursday with a visit to Salt Lake City. The air out West can clear your head. For me, the highlight of his trip came when President Biden gazed at the Grand Canyon and wondered out loud when they'll place his face up there.
• The White House marked the one year anniversary of the CHIPS Act that spent fifty-three billion dollars on the U.S. manufacture of semi-conductor chips, to relieve Taiwan from being our only source of chips. Conspiracy theorists claim Bill Gates want to implant chips into everyone. I hope I get Doritos.
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