October 24th, 2021


Least Competent Criminals | Family Values

News of the Weird by Chuck Shepherd

By News of the Weird by Chuck Shepherd

Published August 10, 2015

Least Competent Criminals | Family Values

One Flaw in the Game Plan: Gary Elliott, 19, was arrested shortly after someone had ripped a hole in the ceiling of Al's Army Navy store in Orlando, Florida, and -- expertly shimmying down a rope, then back up -- made off with about 70 guns in a bag. ("It must be Spider-Man," was proprietor Neal Crasnow's first thought.) However, minutes after the burglary, Elliott came to a police officer's attention on the street, bleeding, carrying the large bag -- and pedaling away on his "getaway" vehicle, which was a genuine tricycle (yes -- three wheels!). [Orlando Sentinel, 7-1-2015]

In a recent BBC documentary, the son of renowned cosmologist Stephen Hawking (Tim, now 36) revealed that his dad is "hugely competitive" and showed him "no compassion at all" when he was growing up. Tim said two of his few avenues of coping with such a famous, oblivious father were when he used to race around in his dad's specialized (and expensive) wheelchair (pretending it was a go-kart) and, for those deliciously awkward moments, adding cuss words to his father's synthesized speech software. [Mother Nature Network, 6-17- 2015]

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