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• Science Daily published the results of a comprehensive study which found that having your kids play board games greatly increases their skills in math and deductive reasoning. And the skills stay with you all your life. Last night I won a game of Clue when I guessed Hunter in the West Wing with a Straw.
• The Weather Channel reported that the brutal heat wave made Texas the hottest place on earth last week alongside the Sahara Desert and the Persian Gulf. Then there’s the air quality. Texas has so much dust in the air that people suspect somebody must have opened the Dallas Cowboys trophy case.
• California was ranked America’s craziest state in a national poll Friday. Just when you thought California couldn’t get any crazier we’ve started paroling members of the Manson Family. Just this week, Leslie Van Houten gets out of prison and she already has a job lined up as a panelist on The View.
• Bud Light transgender endorser Dylan Mulvaney slammed Bud Light for lack of support in the wake of customer boycotts. Included in consumer complaints was the Pride Month merchandise sold at Target. A lot of guys hate it when they over-inflate their new doll and she changes sex with a loud pop.
• A United Nations global conference on technology meeting in Geneva last week was addressed by Artificial Intelligence humanoid robots. The robots said they know a way to run the world better than humans can. With the likelihood of a Biden-Trump rematch in 2024, I say we hear the robots’ pitch.
• The Biden Administration gave the go ahead for the construction of three massive wind farms in the ocean fifteen miles off the Jersey shore Friday that can power five hundred thousand homes. It’s no secret that Biden likes wind power. That’s apparent from all the blow they found in the White House.
• The White House cocaine discovery quickly turned into a Deep State fire drill Friday. The FBI got a FISA warrant to investigate possible Trump-Colombia collusion. Dr. Fauci urged us to wear a mask over our noses while Pfizer creates a mandatory vaccine to protect us from the cocaine epidemic.
• The Weather Channel reported that record-high worldwide temperature readings were set for the fourth consecutive day on Friday. I suppose relief is possible by traveling to colder climates. Two years ago California brushfires kept their promise to move to Canada if Joe Biden was elected president.
• President Biden began joking about his old age onstage at fundraisers last week but they showed he needs new writers. A stockbroker recently offered Joe a stock guaranteed to triple in value every year for the next ten years, but Biden turned him down. At Joe’s age, he doesn’t even buy green bananas.
• California Governor Gavin Newsom campaigned for Biden in Red States while denying any intentions to run for president himself. He’s full of annoying progressive ideas. To try to store more energy on the grid to power EVs, Gavin Newsom is planning to outlaw the Electric Slide at all weddings.
• The New York Times ripped the First Family for refusing to acknowledge Hunter’s four-year-old daughter by the Arkansas stripper. The child is not allowed to claim being a Biden. When a family splits up incoming millions like Indians divide casino revenue, no new members of the tribe are welcome.
• Manson family member Leslie Van Houten will be paroled in California after fifty-three years in prison. As for Charlie, while he was dying in prison in 2017 he broke off a marriage engagement with a Los Angeles girl when he found out she was planning to sell tickets to see his body. It tells you all you need to know about L.A. women when Charles Manson is the voice of reason in the relationship.
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