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• Coney Island hosted the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest Tuesday, won for the sixteenth year by Joey Chestnut. He beat the dozen other contestants at the table by wolfing down sixty-two hot dogs in ten minutes. For greediness and tasteless gluttony, the contest ranks second only to NBA free agency.
• The Washington Post reported the Secret Service discovered white powder in the White House on Tuesday which turned out to be cocaine. That's the drug that signifies success in show business. It's the first sign that Joe Biden is so funny that he's just been made a paid regular at the Comedy Store.
• California Governor Gavin Newsom addressed a Democratic dinner in Idaho Monday which got huge social media play and cable news encouragement. You can tell the Deep State is anxious to push Biden out the door. The feds found cocaine at the White House on Tuesday and not at Mar-a-Lago.
• Bobby Kennedy's campaign reported Sunday it raised ten million dollars last month from large and small donors from both Democrats and Republicans. RFK has a populist message that's anti-war and centrist. The political and media Establishment is getting so nervous Trump could get the month off.
• Pew Research says seventy percent of Americans believe in Heaven while sixty percent believe in Hell. A cartoonist friend of mine heard this and sent me a cartoon that got my attention. It shows St. Peter turning me away at Heaven's Gate while showing me all the submarine jokes I posted last week.
• The White House was blocked by a U.S. judge from communicating with social media companies due to a lawsuit. They may have used the pandemic as a pretext to block conservative views. It didn't look good during the Hong Kong protests when China called and said they wanted their censorship back.
• President Biden addressed reporters and ripped the Supreme Court Friday and stood by his son Hunter. It's always an adventure when Joe wanders off the Teleprompter. President Biden insisted that American families are much better off financially because of their untaxed income from Burisma.
• The California Reparations Task Force issued its final report to Governor Newsom Friday which recommended a range of make-good measures to California blacks. Aggrieved victimhood calls out for compensation. Everybody in America would be a millionaire today if only being offended paid better.
• Daily Variety noted a bright pink Barbie Dollhouse mansion is now perched in Malibu as part of the publicity for the movie Barbie's international release in two weeks. And to show support for women's rights worldwide, Mattel plans to create Afghan Barbie. Don't we already have blow-up dolls?
• Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny starring Harrison Ford totaled eighty million at the box office last weekend. Not bad for an eighty-year-old. The movie is doing well enough for Harrison Ford to merit a sixth and final adventure movie, Indiana Jones and the Missing Glasses on the Top of his Head.
• Boston's Independence Day Parade Tuesday celebrated the Shot heard Round the world. And just to stay on the safe side we've kept shooting ever since. The FBI says ninety-nine percent of mass shootings are committed by men so if feminists want to make an impact they need to step up their game.
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