Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• Barack Obama addressed friends, donors and Democrat leaders at the opening of the President Obama Presidential Library in Chicago Thursday. I thought it was so racist that Obama had to speak onstage from behind bulletproof glass. Just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot anyone.

• The Barack Obama Presidential Library opening drew Democratic Party royalty to Chicago for the event. Seated in a booth onstage were former Democratic presidents Bill Clinton and his wife Hillary and Joe Biden and his wife Jill, and nobody was happier than Joe. He thought it was his library.

• Barack Obama at his library opening on Thursday faulted the nation's Founders for allowing slavery in the U.S. Obama's, Michelle's, Kamala's, Biden's and Bill Clinton's ancestors all owned slaves. Is this a library opening or a meeting of the Sons and Daughters of the American Confederacy?

• JD Vance is doing the talk shows plugging his book about his religious faith. JD said he hopes his Hindu wife someday converts to Christianity, and she may have just taken a step that direction. After watching how JD was treated by the Women of the View, she'll never think cows are sacred again.

• The U.S. World Cup team hosted the Australian team in Seattle on Friday. A photo was posted of two 7-year-old boys in Australian colors watching the game in the stadium together, each holding a cup of a beer. Say what you want about the World Cup, but at least it's getting the kids off the phones.

• The U.S.-Iran deal includes a $300 billion re-construction deal that will re-build everything U.S. missiles, bombs destroyed. It raises the same old question after our Middle East wars. Did Lockheed Martin make more money by leveling the country than Halliburton will make by rebuilding the country?

• The U.S. Navy opened the Hormuz Strait Thursday and the same day Iran invited U.S. and IAEA nuclear inspectors. Democrats figure if the Iran peace deal works out for Trump, they can always go back to scandals involving underage girls. They have photos of Trump with the Saudi Crown Prince.

• The Washington DC's mayor's race was won by a Socialist Tuesday on top of New York elected one, and a socialist is surging for L.A.'s mayor. Last night at the Comedy Store I told my first socialist joke. I said Mamdani sawed the Knicks trophy in half, saying 50% goes to the city, and everybody got it.

• The Senate bickered without conclusion Thursday over the U.S.-Iran deal, renewal of the FISA and illegal alien deportation funding. The chaos gave me a life lesson. I watched clips of the Senate arguing and it dawned on me that the more annoying and useless a person is, the longer they live.

• President Trump signed the memorandum of understanding with Iran on Thursday, opening the Strait of Hormuz and causing world oil prices to begin dropping like a stone. Oil prices had created a political nightmare for Trump. Americans are tired of being told you can still get $2 gas at Taco Bell.

• President Trump signed the memorandum of understanding with Iran while dining in Versailles Thursday. One curious clause has Iran agreeing to flood their U.S. bomb-crushed nuclear dust with water to dilute it. All it takes is for a lizard to drink it and it'll be Godzilla blocking the Strait of Hormuz.

• Barack Obama announced the entertainment for the grand opening of his presidential library in Chicago Tuesday and then he lectured Americans about everyone's insatiable desire for fame and money and attention today. I understand his annoyance. No comedian likes to see everyone doing his act.

• California disclosed plans to check to see if contractors are gay enough to merit state contracts that are by law required to go to LGBTQ companies; requiring a letter from 3 friends stating that you are indeed homosexual. It prevents fraud. You simply can't get 4 Somali Muslims to agree to do this.

• A Chicago college student was arrested for burning a cross in Chicago, saying it was a protest against President Trump's policies. He said he had no idea a burning cross was a symbol of racial hatred toward blacks. If convicted, he could get 5-10 years as head of the Southern Poverty Law Center.

• The G-7 Summit leaders meeting in France agreed to coordinate their AI research to try to keep AI safe. AI didn't scare me until I saw on the news a video of a robot milking a cow as a dairy farmer stood watching. I realized how horribly wrong this could go if the dairy farmer didn't have his pants on.

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