Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• Hasbro released a Monopoly board game set in Africa that uses local landmarks and streets and culture as you go around the board. It's never a dull moment. I'm playing Monopoly Somalia now and so far I've got 1 mud hut, 3 AK-47s, 2 chickens, $10 million in Medicaid fraud payments and Ebola.

• The Chicago Bears were reported Monday very close to a deal that would move the team twenty miles to a new domed stadium to be built in Indiana. It's tough to play in Chicago. Last year the Bears lost three players to knee injuries, one player to shoulder injury, and six players to bullet wounds.

• The New York Knicks hosted the San Antonio Spurs in Game 3 of the NBA Finals at Madison Square Garden Monday. Scalpers were getting $50,000 from people desperate to be at the game. At the same time, the New York Mets announced if you bring a subway token, they'll let you play 1st base.

• The Appalachian Trail is reportedly jam-packed with hikers and campers and wilderness lovers this month. June is National Camping month. Backpacker Magazine reported that Americans will spend $4.6 billion this year on camping and hiking equipment, and that's just in downtown Los Angeles.

• California's Secretary of State came under fire over the state's rules about ballot integrity that permit questionably gathered and signed ballots to be mailed in and counted a week after the election. It's a moot point now. They finally finished counting the votes in Los Angeles and the new mayor is Al Gore.

• Spencer Pratt's upset bid to be elected L.A. mayor came to an end on Monday. The post-election mail-in ballots poured in for the Democratic candidates. Pratt's candidacy was the most original idea an out-of-work actor's had to try to find work without an agent since Reagan ran for governor in 1966.

• The Ronald Reagan Presidential Library opened an America 250 Exhibition Monday displaying artifacts, documents, weapons, paintings, photos and film footage of America's history. Back in the 1980s, President Reagan referred to America as The Shining City on a Hill. Today it's just The Shining.

• President Trump was loudly booed by the NBA Finals attendees at Madison Square Garden when he came up on the video screen. Look, I'm a history guy and Americans HATE cease-fires when we're kicking the hell out of some country. It's like the ref stopping a Mike Tyson fight too early.

• President Trump urged Iran to close a peace deal Sunday after Iran fired missiles at Israel for firing missiles at Hezbollah. It prompted the U.S. to fire missiles at Iran for firing missiles at Kuwait. Today the Three Wise Men wouldn't know if they were following a star or a cruise missile to Bethlehem.

• President Trump walked off an interview with NBC's Kristen Welker over rigged election claims in California. Kristen pleaded with Trump not to leave her, saying 3 times that she'd flown ALL the way to Wisconsin to interview him. It was a lesson to every woman to never go on a plane flight to see a man.

• Jill Biden insisted in interviews during her book tour last week that she fully supported Kamala Harris for president in 2024 once Joe was overthrown. She may run again. The latest polls have Kamala leading all 2028 potential Democratic candidates for president with a 39% blood-alcohol level.

• Maine Senate candidate Graham Platner said his heavy drinking led to his womanizing, that's all in the past. GOP Texas Senate candidate Ken Paxton had an affair that led to his recent divorce. Mitzi Shore always told me I could have been a U.S. Senator, and I mistakenly took it as a compliment.

• Scott Pelley was interviewed by the New York Times over his CBS firing and said hearing he was fired by CBS was like hearing his wife had been murdered. Leave it to a comedian to understand Scott's thinking when he said that. Whenever things don't go my way I always ask myself what would O.J. do?

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