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• President Biden was easy to spot at the Juneteenth party at the White House Monday. He was the white guy clapping on 1-3 and swaying the wrong way. Juneteenth celebrates that great day in human rights in June 1865 when all of America's slaves were freed, and replaced by illegal immigrants.
• Hunter Biden was found guilty by the jury on three counts in federal court of lying on his gun purchase form about his drug use. It won't affect his dad's re-election chances this fall. Democrats dismissed the news of Hunter's conviction as Russian disinformation, and 51 intelligence officials agreed.
• The New York Post noted Hunter's affair with his brother's widow may have saved his life since she got rid of the gun he bought while he was loaded. The affair sounded a little hillbilly-ish to me. I guess if Hunter has to go to prison his conjugal visits can come during the same time as his family visits.
• Lafayette Square across from the White House remains the center of angry protests by pro-Hamas rioters. They defaced statues of Lafayette and Rochambeau, which had no protection. In the old days, the statues of Robert E. Lee and Jeb Stuart would have ridden in from Virginia to their rescue.
• The Daily Mail reported a mild panic in many capitals of the European Union Monday over the political swing to the right in EU parliamentary elections. How far to the right is the voter swing? We might have to invite Vladimir Putin to join NATO to prevent Germany from invading Russia again.
• The Alabama Miss Pageant made news over the weekend by selecting a three hundred pound plus-sized model and podcast host to be crowned Alabama Miss of 2024. Talk about inflation. It's caused the Alabama Miss pageant and the National Hot Dog Eating Contest to combine shows this year.
• The New York Post ran the latest Gallup poll which found that that 77% of Americans are very dissatisfied with the way things are going down in the United States. The best advice I can give is to stop blaming the Democrats or Republicans for everything. Learn Feng Shui and blame the furniture.
• The Southern Baptist Convention is meeting to vote on whether to ban women clergy. They'd make great preachers. While I was in college, several Southern Baptist girls told me to go straight to Hell, and they said it more directly and more forcefully than Billy Graham on his best day in the pulpit.
• President Biden's job approval rating fell to 37% Monday prompting election guru Nate Silver to recommend he step aside for a Democrat with a better chance to win. I say it's Hunter Biden in 2024. Trump's proved that the country loves outlaws and Hunter's proved he'll always put the party first.
• Hunter Biden's felony drug-and-gun trial went to the jury in Delaware Monday with a verdict likely Tuesday. The courtroom pressure on the jury was intense during final arguments. A dozen of the extended Biden family sat on the front row in court including Vito, Sonny, Michael and Fredo Biden.
• Donald Trump warned of sharks up and down the East Coast in his Nevada speech Monday. Back when we had a Comedy Store in Honolulu in 1985, I was body-surfing and I saw a large shark pass right by me and I made an interesting scientific discovery. Did you know that adrenaline is brown?
• The World Health Organization issued a warning Friday of the imminent threat of a Bird Flu pandemic that could sweep the planet after a laboratory confirmed a case of human Bird Flu infection. The administration responded promptly. President Biden just ordered the bombing of the Canary Islands.
• Andrew Jackson's statue in Washington was defaced by pro-Hamas protestors Friday. Jackson routed the Five Civilized Tribes in Georgia and Florida for siding with the British in 1776 and 1812 and force-marched them to Oklahoma. It's the only war in U.S. history in which the loser got the oil land.
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