October 24th, 2021


Least Competent Criminals | Animals in the News

News of the Weird by Chuck Shepherd

By News of the Weird by Chuck Shepherd

Published June 5, 2015

Least Competent Criminals <B>|</B> Animals in the News

Nikko Jenkins, convicted of murder in a 2013 spree and trying to avoid a scheduled sentencing hearing, recently self-mutilated (for the second time), which he told a judge in Omaha, Nebraska, was evidence of his mental disorder that should render him ineligible for death row.

Jenkins told the judge that a "serpent god" had ordered him to carve the "number of the beast" into his forehead, but apparently because Jenkins was looking into a mirror as he carved, his forehead display more resembled an upside-down 999 (or a lowercase ddd) than it did 666. [Omaha World-Herald, 4-17-2015]

(1) Tidiest Animal: In a February science journal report, a University of Regensburg (Germany) professor noted that ants seem particularly orderly -- with "toilet" facilities arranged in far corners of the nests. The researcher speculated that ants keep feces on hand in order to mine nutrients.

(2) Least Competent Beaver: A local logger telephoned the Agder Natural History museum in Kristiansand, Norway, in April to report that he had encountered a beaver crushed to death because it was unable to judge which way the tree it was gnawing would fall. (Usually, beavers have an uncanny ability to avoid the tree, but some stragglers still populate their gene pool.) [Los Angeles Times, 2-18-2015] [The Local (Oslo), 4-16-2015]

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