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• President Biden confidently declared Thursday that he will defeat Trump in November and save democracy. The bad news is inflation numbers reported that day continue to soar in both retail and wholesale prices. The good news is, O.J. Simpson can finally rest, knowing that his wife's killer is dead.
• O.J. Simpson died Thursday setting off a media circus that's followed him since his USC Heisman Trophy days, his NFL Hall of Fame career, TV, movies and a riveting televised murder trial. O.J. reportedly died of cancer. The cancer responded by saying it will work day and night to find the real killer.
• The Las Vegas Review Journal broke the news that O.J. Simpson died at his home in Las Vegas late Wednesday night surrounded by his kids and his grandkids. The story is just getting started. Ten minutes after the Las Vegas coroner pronounced O.J. dead, a downtown L.A. jury ruled that he's alive.
• Shohei Ohtani's interpreter was charged in L.A. with stealing fourteen million dollars from Shohei to pay gambling debts. The slugger is so wealthy he didn't realize he was being ripped off to pay for someone else's profligate spending. If convicted his interpreter could get ten-to-twenty years in Congress.
• The White House was slammed by bad reports last week as inflation kept soaring both in retail and wholesale prices. It's gone up 19% since Biden took office. However President Biden argues that inflation has actually decreased dramatically since he took office, if you hold the chart upside down.
• The NAIA executive council voted Tuesday to ban trans-gender women from participating in small college sports, adding pressure to the NCAA to ban them. I understand. I think it's especially unfair in the sport of women's swimming, because the trans-gender women are swimming with a rudder.
• The Wall Street Journal reported Tuesday that NASA sent three rockets into space on the day of the eclipse. They each had their role. The first two rockets went up to examine the eclipse from space, and the third rocket contained a planetary lander tasked to see if there is any intelligent life on The View.
• The MDK Project is reported conducting macho training camps in Chino, California, to convert everyday guys into alpha males. There truly is a brotherhood of man. Joggers always give each other a respectful nod when they pass by each other on the street, the same way fat guys do at the buffet.
• CNBC reports the $37 billion in sales of alcoholic spirits beat beer and wine sales in America for the second straight year in 2023. Modern Health cited a survey which shows that Americans who are over the age of 65 are drinking more than ever before. Maybe that's because it's so difficult to chew.
• Billboard magazine reported that Beyonce's song Texas Hold Em tops the country music charts for the eighth consecutive week along with her number-one country music album Country Carter. No one expected Jay Z's wife to create a completely new music genre. I guess you could call it Hick Hop.
• The New York Post cited a study showing a record number of Millennials are still living at home with their parents. And when Millennials do buy a home, it's reported that dogs, not marriage or kids, are the number-one reason they buy their first house. And that is surprising, because dogs are expensive.
• Donald Trump said he believes that abortion should be left up to individual states to decide on the specific laws. Every state has different constituencies. For instance, Arizona has so many retirees living in the state, you'd think that most Arizonans think pro-choice is whether to be cremated or buried.
• Donald Trump campaigned in Georgia and went to a Chick-Fil-A and bought thirty milkshakes for everyone. He was seen on TV being mobbed by adoring black women who might have seen his mug shot. All the Democrats had to do was make him a Fulton County gangster and the magic just happened.
• South Africa's famous Olympic Blade Runner Oscar Pistorious is reportedly struggling to find a job because he's considered too toxic. He was convicted of murdering his girlfriend but served only six years in jail. The difference between Oscar and Joe Biden is it takes Oscar less time to finish a sentence.
• Boeing was accused Tuesday of ignoring a whistleblower's claim about the allegedly critically flawed manufacturing process for its 787 Dream Liner series of airplanes. You have to admit they got the name right. They call it the Dream Liner because whenever the plane gets tired it just wants to crash.
• Rupert Murdoch, worldwide newspaper tycoon, the owner of 20th Century Fox and founder of the Fox News Channel, is engaged to be married for a fifth time to a wealthy Russian widow. Rupert is ninety-two years old and the bride is decades younger. They're planning to have an open-casket wedding.
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