Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• The National Retail Federation said Americans spent $29 billion on Valentine's Day. For the rest of this week, there's a special offer to late-celebrating couples for a Valentine's Day candlelight dinner at Waffle House. So guys if your relationship is on life support this is a great way to pull the plug.

• The Mob Museum in Las Vegas opened an exhibit saluting Al Capone with photos, newsreels and interviews about his gangster rule over Chicago a century ago. I did my part and paid tribute to the famed mobster. On Saturday, I celebrated The St. Valentine's Day Massacre by killing all chocolates.

• The U.S. Hockey Team remained undefeated in the Winter Games in Milan on Saturday with a come-from-behind victory over Denmark. The TV ratings for a re-match could be gigantic. If the U.S. and Denmark hockey teams meet again in the finals, they've agreed that the winner gets Greenland.

• Tiger Woods will serve as host at the Genesis Open in L.A. at Riviera, but still can't play. His womanizing led to his back surgeries requiring pain killers that caused the SUV crash that led to all his knee surgeries. The lesson is if you are the best in the world at one thing, it's bad luck to diversify.

• The USS Gerald Ford steamed into the Persian Gulf Friday to join the U.S. naval armada that is confronting Iran. I just hope the guns on that ship are more accurate than President Ford's tee shots. Jerry Ford's golf game was so dangerous everybody just assumed he was a hit man for the PGA.

• U.S. negotiators meet with Iranian officials in Geneva today to try to eliminate Iran's nuclear program. The U.S. is operating with only the best of intentions. Trump only wants the Iranians to have liberty, freedom, prosperity and a U.S. missile base just a 9-iron shot over the Caspian Sea from Russia.

• The Coast Guard blew up another speedboat full of drugs in the Caribbean Sunday. It's mind boggling to think until 1913, every Coca-Cola contained 3 and 1/2 grams of cocaine. Its inventor Dr. Pemberton floated the advertising slogan An 8-Ball in Every Glass but felt it was a little too on the nose.

• The New England Journal of Medicine reported people are experiencing blood clots from taking the Covid-19 vaccines that Dr. Fauci mandated in 2020. I guess it does help to make you more open to romantic love. Thanks to Dr. Fauci, millions of Americans have a much bigger heart.

• U.S. figure skater Ilia Malinin, the heavy favorite to win the Gold, blew it Friday with a terrible performance that left him in 8th place. The sport needs more comedy. They'd draw a lot more viewers if they held it on a pond that was just starting to crack and melt in places the skater doesn't know about.

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