Jewish World Review Jan. 14, 2002 / Rosh Chodesh Shevat, 5762
CNN is now embarrassed because one of its promotion people tried to get some men to watch Paula in the morning by pointing out her attractiveness in an advertisement. I know Ms. Zahn pretty well, having worked with her at ABC News and Fox. She is very professional, but she does spend a lot of time, shall we say, grooming. And it's time well spent -- she looks good! Some guys might even think she's sexy -- although you didn't hear that from me.
But Paula Zahn does not want to be known for her physical attributes. She wants to be known for her competency as a journalist. Fine. But you can be sexy and a good journalist at the same time. How do I know, you ask? Everybody's a comedian these days ...
Anyway, back to Paula and her sexiness. Here's the deal. In the politically correct world of TV news it is considered sexist to mention an anchorwoman's looks, even though they are vitally important. The driving force in the TV news game is ratings, and guys like to look at attractive women ... so, if you want guys to watch your news, you've got to have some good-looking babes on the roster.
Women are generally much smarter and more civilized than males, so they will accept anchormen who are credible but not hunks. Thank God for that. It's not fair, but that's the way it is. Yes, Walter Cronkite is a good example of what I'm talking about.
And so is Eleanor Roosevelt. Very intelligent woman. No way she's reading the news on TV. It would never happen. Shallow men would tune out.
Shallow is the key word here. In order to make money, TV news must appeal to as many people as possible -- and that includes the shallow, of whom there is no shortage. Eyeballs are eyeballs. It doesn't matter to the news bosses -- nor to the anchorpeople, for that matter -- who is watching, as long as they are watching.
When I heard Paula Zahn express indignation that her promo contained the word "sexy," I laughed. Hey, hey, Paula, if they think you're sexy and watch you each morning, take it to the bank and hush up. Your livelihood depends on a mass audience, and it doesn't matter why they like you, as long as they do. You can still be a skilled interviewer and writer, and give a little wink now and then.
The feminists object to that, but most of them live in a world of ideological platitudes. TV news is the trenches. A mean, nasty world where cutthroat competition decides who stays and who goes. News-reading gladiators all over the United States are just a bad ratings book away from having to get a real job. TV news is survival of the fittest, and sometimes that means the prettiest and sexiest. Sometimes it means other things, too, but you use what you've got.
The American people, I believe, know very well that many TV anchorpeople are full of it and know little about the news. It's showbiz, and the audience chooses which show means the most to them.
In the case of the male audience ages 25 to 54, a great-looking lady helps the news about Mullah Omar go down just a little smoother. Nothing wrong with that. And you can't fight it, Paula. Just be happy you look the way you do. And here's lookin' at you,
01/07/02: And justice for none