Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

SIGN UP FOR THE DAILY JWR UPDATE. IT'S FREE. (AND NO SPAM!) Just click here.

• The Weather Channel reported a Polar Vortex blasted Michigan with blizzards and sub-zero temperatures. The temperature reading from Hell, Michigan, got everybody in the state excited. It read that Hell is seven below zero, leading everyone to believe the Lions had just won the Super Bowl.

• The Kansas City Chiefs' reign over the AFC appeared over after Sunday night's loss left them with a losing record. This year's team highlight will be the marriage between tight end Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift. Kelce looks to be the first tight end to successfully tie the knot since Aaron Hernandez.

• The Hollywood Reporter published a special collection of old photos and copy honoring the late great Frank Sinatra on the 110th anniversary of his birth Friday. I've read every book and heard every story about Sinatra, we had the same barber. My biggest surprise is that he died of natural causes.

• President Trump was greeted by a wildly enthusiastic crowd in Eastern Pennsylvania Tuesday where he took their minds off the Philadelphia Eagles. In Sunday's loss, QB Jalen Hurts committed 5 turnovers, 2 turnovers on just one play. The next day Pillsbury signed him to a huge endorsement deal.

• President Trump on Monday announced $12 billion payments to farmers not to grow certain crops. The farmers are scheduled to start receiving direct payments in February. One of the many quirks of American capitalism is how socialism suddenly becomes acceptable before mid-term elections.

• The Pentagon briefed the Group of Six Senators on the US attacks on the speedboats trying to bring Fentanyl-laced cocaine into the U.S. The missile strikes are intended to send a message to South American drug cartels, a message that says No Mas. That's a Spanish phrase meaning your boat's on fire.

• Newsweek lectured there's no emphasis on halting illegal drug use in America this year. No attack on a coke boat curtails its hold on you once you're hooked. Here in Hollywood cocaine is like the Matterhorn at Disneyland, it might be the oldest ride in the park, but it always has the longest lines.

• The New York Times reports the United Nations slashed its Emergency Aid projection in half for 2026 due to cuts by the U.S. and Europe. The UN is widely ignored by most comedians, but not me. On the UN calendar, today is International Anti-Corruption Day, or as the Somalis call it, Thursday.

• The Air Force posted a tribute to The Right Stuff test pilot legend Chuck Yeager Monday on the date of his 2016 passing at the age of 97. It so happened that 36 years earlier in 1980, John Lennon died the exact same date. To their credit, both Chuck and John's wife Yoko Ono broke the sound barrier.

(COMMENT, BELOW)