Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• President

• Secretary of War Pete Hegseth hosted a defense seminar at the Reagan Library on Friday and took questions from reporters. During the day he sank a 22nd drug speedboat. Right now there is so much cocaine in the water in the Caribbean, everyone finally knows why the dolphins call it a blow hole.

• The FBI warned consumers Friday to beware holiday shopping scams hatched by fraudulent charities that prey on sympathies. One is genuine. The Minneapolis United Way has issued a holiday appeal asking all the Somalis on welfare to donate $10 a month to aid the working families of Minnesota.

• Daily Variety reports that South Americans are still going to movie theaters in large numbers to enjoy movies together, unlike Americans, who prefer to stream movies. Venezuela is now producing its first-ever James Bond movie full of action, danger and deafening explosions. It's called License to Fish.

• Michael Dell was in the Oval Office to donate $6 billion to initiate Trump Accounts for every child born from 2025-28. It'll start them with $1,000 compounded interest-bearing investment accounts. It's a brilliant way to turn all the migrants' children into Republicans by the time they reach voting age.

• President Trump ripped Minnesota Governor Tim Walz for what Trump called ignoring the $6 billion in welfare fraud committed by Somali arrivals. They bring their culture with them across the ocean. Michigan has imported so many Somalis they're now attacking oil tankers on Lake Superior.

• The Hollywood Reporter reports Netflix bought historic Warner Bros. Studio for $72 billion Friday. It's bad news for Turner Classic Movie fans. By using AI to comply with Netflix DEI casting policies, Errol Flynn, Humphrey Bogart and James Cagney will be portrayed as sassy, gay black women.

• The Baseball Hall of Fame Committee on Sunday again voted to deny entry to accused steroids users. Barry Bonds' use of banned substances should be considered in context. Babe Ruth hit 714 home runs during Prohibition, and before every game in the 1920s he would have tested positive for beer.

• The Weather Channel reported no hurricanes hit the U.S. for the first time in 10 years. I credit our tight border policy. No hurricanes dared to enter the U.S. after President Trump renamed the Gulf after America, threatened Mother Nature with 900% tariffs and had El Nino and La Nina deported.

• Nancy Pelosi vowed Friday to remain active in politics after she steps down from Congress in January. It may be no coincidence that forty members of Congress are retiring after this session. I find it hilarious that it took a ban on insider stock trading to finally achieve two-term limits in Congress.

• President Trump conducted the lighting of the National Christmas Tree on the White House Ellipse Thursday. His immigration policy has inspired a new Christmas carol in the barrio. He's making a list, checking it twice, going to find who's deported by ICE, Donald Trump is coming to town!

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