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• The Washington Post published a post-election poll of Americans Friday showing optimism about the nation's economic prospects in 2025. I swear you can feel the good cheer sweeping the nation. I don't know if you had to deal with your health insurance provider today, but they're being real friendly.
• New York sought the extradition of HMO executive shooter Luigi Mangione from Pennsylvania Tuesday after his arrest in Altoona. He was spotted by an employee at McDonald's who called the police. Burger King immediately issued a statement assuring the American people that they don't snitch.
• The NYPD identified arrested Luigi Mangioni as prime murder suspect in the murder of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson on the streets of New York. His name sounds vaguely familiar to me. I watch DVDs of great old TV series late at night and didn't Luigi Mangione own the Bada Bing?
• Luigi Mangione came from a rich family, was a prep school and Ivy Leaguer who went nuts after a back operation to fix a surfing injury and killed a wealthy CEO. I don't understand why he's being charged. You'd think that white privilege killing white privilege would be no harm, no foul in New York.
• Taylor Swift ended her two-year-long Eras Tour with an electrifying performance in Vancouver last weekend and thanked her fans for the greatest experience of her life. After the show Taylor tipped her stage crew $197 million in bonuses. Not to brag, but I've satisfied every waitress who ever served me.
• The New York Mets signed 26-year-old superstar Juan Soto to a 15-year contract for a total of $765 million to play for the rest of his career with the New York Mets. It's heartbreaking to see such a talented player leave Major League Baseball at such a young age. He had so much ahead of him.
• Los Angeles firefighters rushed seven helicopters to Malibu Tuesday to try to hold off a brushfire causing residents to be ordered to evacuate. Residents in Los Angeles drove there through flames and smoke to knock on doors in Malibu to help them get out. People will do anything to meet a director.
• Marine vet Daniel Penny was found not guilty Monday in the death of a drug-crazed homeless attacker who died after Penny subdued him to protect the other subway riders. They were of all races. New Yorkers just want subway cars to be a place where people can travel and pee in safety.
• Fox News host Judge Jeanine Pirro interviewed subway hero Daniel Penny Tuesday a day after he was cleared by a jury of manslaughter. The left denounced the not-guilty verdict as racist. Angry and mentally deranged homeless people protested the verdict Tuesday by refusing to ride on the subway.
• The Times of London performed a financial autopsy on the Kamala Harris campaign spending to ascertain how she left the party millions and millions in debt. Vendors have been stiffed. Last night, the Anger Management Class at the DNC headquarters had to be postponed for classroom repairs.
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