Gee, that certainly explains it! | Recalculating ...

• Lisa Faye Stout, 53, came up with an unusual scapegoat for the mess police officers found in her room on Sept. 10 at New Castle, Indiana's Raintree Inn, according to the Muncie Star Press. Vampires had "destroyed everything," Stout told the officers, who were responding to reports that she had shown up in the hotel bar wearing no pants or undergarments. The front desk clerk also said Stout spit on her and threatened to kill her. As she was taken into custody, Stout spit some more and threatened to "slice" officers' throats. Stout was charged in Henry County court with two counts of battery by bodily waste, intimidation and criminal mischief. [The Star Press, 9/13/2017]

• Well, it WAS dark ... Gabriel Bishop of Sellersville, Pennsylvania, put all his faith in his car's GPS system on the evening of Sept. 9, even as it directed him to follow a bike path running alongside the Lehigh River in Easton.

According to Lehighvalleylive.com, when the path led under a low bridge, Bishop realized his mistake and tried to back up, but ended up rolling his car into the river. Easton police reported that Bishop was uninjured, but he did receive citations for multiple traffic offenses. [Lehigh Valley Live, 9/10/2017]