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• New York Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani came to the White House Friday to meet President Trump and discuss ways the two bitter ideological foes could cooperate to aid New Yorkers. Their meeting went a lot better than I expected. Mamdani didn't get deported and Trump didn't get beheaded.
• Ariana Grande appeared on the Tonight Show last week promoting her role in the new Wicked movie. She loves doing charity work. Last month Ariana posted an emotional appeal on behalf of the children of Africa and the children of Africa pitched in and now Ariana is getting the food she needs.
• President Trump signed the bill passed by Congress Thursday requiring the DOJ to release all the Jeffrey Epstein files. It's awful. A guy in Beverly Hills went to court Friday to change his legal name from Jeffrey Epstein to Hannibal Lector to give him a better chance of attracting a nice girlfriend.
• Jasmine Crockett cited the wrong Jeffrey Epstein as a GOP donor Thursday and it brought up the fact that there are 200 Americans with the same name as the pedophile. I once had a close pal named Jeffrey Epstein and it was a living nightmare for him. He ended up hanging himself in a jail cell.
• Netflix is airing a documentary detailing the life and death of notorious underage sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein titled Jeffrey Epstein the Undetected Story. It's really quite riveting. The documentary covers Epstein's entire life from his days on the playground all the way up to his days on the playground.
• Disney Studios announced construction is underway to transform the Animation Courtyard into the Magic of Animation Arena. Last week the 5th person died in one month while they were at Disney World. A lot of people are blaming it on the park's new ride, The Hillary Clinton Experience.
• The White House slammed six Washington lawmakers with military backgrounds who posted a video urging U.S. military personnel to disobey orders they deem illegal. The aircraft carrier USS Gerald Ford wasn't listening in. The Weather Channel reports the 5-day forecast for Venezuela is 2 days.
• President Trump took a break from threatening Venezuela and accusing House and Senate Democrats of sedition plus two speeches and two press conferences every day to chat with New York's new communist mayor. There is a support group for comedians who are always on. It's called an audience.
• First Lady Melania Trump is scheduled to welcome the arrival of the White House Christmas Tree this morning which will arrive aboard a horse-drawn coach at the South Portico. The tree is a 25-foot-high fir tree that was grown in Michigan, just outside Detroit. It was cut down trying to escape.
• Nucleus Genomics unveiled a new IVF process that allows parents to select embryos that have DNA markers tied to health and longevity. Gene splicing isn't always successful. Last week I heard that scientists in Europe combined the DNA of a Cheetah with that of a Crab, and things went sideways fast.
• PBS is airing filmmaker and Whig historian Ken Burns' five-part documentary this week which glorifies the American Revolution. It was a noisy civil war that continues to this day. I believe this is the perfect time for Mel Brooks to cast King George III in a Broadway musical comedy called Miss Me Yet?
• Nashville stars expressed outrage after an AI generated performer named Breaking Rust sang a song that tops today's country charts. What's next could be even more confounding. People are now worried that AI will become self-aware, while I can't even get my toaster to understand lightly browned.
• NBC Los Angeles had to go to split-screen to cover three different police car chases that broke out all over town Wednesday afternoon. One was a reckless driver, another a stolen car and a third a murder suspect. The White House boasted that gas prices are so low Los Angeles has returned to normal.
• Democrat former Treasury Secretary Larry Summers apologized to his Harvard students about his friendship with Epstein but said he'll stay on as their professor. Hours later he was fired. So many prodigies go to school at Harvard, you have to believe a good number of the freshmen girls are under 18.
• Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson accused Donald Trump of wielding administrative policies to re-fight the Civil War on behalf of the South. Right call, wrong side. If Mayor Johnson only knew that the South seceded from the Union over high tariffs he'd realize that Trump is fighting for the North.
• President Trump spoke at the Saudi-US Forum Wednesday and urged the Saudis to join the Abraham Accords and secure permanent Mideast Peace. He's insatiable. Trump's not happy with the presidency and his name on so many buildings, he wants it to be the last chapter in the Torah.
• GOP Oversight Chairman James Comer threatened to have Bill and Hillary Clinton arrested if they continue to refuse to testify in the Epstein hearings. Bill tried to cheer up Hillary this morning. Bill reminded Hillary that Nelson Mandela wasn't elected president until he'd served 27 years in prison.
• Senate and House Democrats posted a video Tuesday urging the U.S. military to refuse to follow orders they deem illegal. They claim it's to rein in what they call presidential authoritarianism. Last week Trump ordered extra tartar sauce on his Filet o' Fish and there was grumbling behind the counter.
• A House committee met to discuss limiting stock trades by members of Congress or prohibiting them altogether, to keep them focused on their jobs and not their portfolios. This past year three House members passed away. One had cancer at 73, one had heart failure at 86 and the other had Tesla at 480.
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