Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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• Daily Variety reports widespread fear in Hollywood that AI could put every actor and writer out of work. This week L.A. street repair crews are working on Olive Street near Warner Bros, and an electronic road sign is flashing Road Closed M-F. Passers-by just assume they hired Samuel L. Jackson.

• Lilo and Stitch, the animated film about a Hawaiian girl Lilo and her pet space alien robot dog Stitch, set box office records over Memorial Day. It says a lot about the industry. Finishing a distant second was Tom Cruise's movie Mission Impossible: The Final Reckoning if We Get Beat by a Cartoon.

• The FBI announced it's opening a probe into the cocaine that was discovered inside the Biden White House in July of 2023. The scandal improved my table manners. For the rest of that summer I perfected the art of eating a powdered donut so it didn't look like I'd just been on the White House tour.

• The WNBA's No Space for Hate initiatives is discouraging booing, implying that it's racist. For beginning stand-up comics, an open display of crowd anger is healthy for them. Back in my open mike days, if it hadn't been for everything they threw at us onstage we would've never gotten our vegetables.

• President Trump directed the Pentagon to receive the $400 million airliner gift from Qatar and convert into an Air Force One. It saved U.S. taxpayers $400 million on a new presidential plane. If Trump hadn't accepted the gift it would've been the biggest waste of money on Jets since Aaron Rodgers.

• President Trump's Golden Dome missile shield was ripped by China, Russia and North Korea Tuesday. The three countries have hypersonic missiles that can reach L.A. in 40 minutes. Once the missiles get here they will need to get an agent and a publicist or they're not going anywhere in this town.

• The CDC reported Tuesday that healthy kids no longer need to take the Covid vaccine shot. My neighbor died due to Covid. In his basement he stockpiled 300 cases of toilet paper, 1,000 cases of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice and 50 cases of water, and the whole lot collapsed and buried him.

• Vanity Fair ran an article Monday asking if President Biden's White House staff were covering up for his mental decline or living in delusion. It's 50-50. Recently Jill accompanied Joe on The Women of the View to try to show that he's still alive, but after watching the interview I need more proof.

• The New York Times reported the DNC is spending $20 million to research how Democrats can appeal to men. It's all about candidate selection. If Democrats want to attract winning candidates like Jack Kennedy and Bill Clinton, they just need to watch past episodes of The Bachelor till it sinks in.

• French President Emmanuel Macron was red-faced Sunday when video caught his wife Brigitte slapping him in the face at the open doorway of their plane after they landed in Vietnam. France's first lady is 72 years old while he is only 47. Brigitte Macron's name translated into English means Jill Belichick.

• Texas Governor Greg Abbott signed a law that requires every Texas public school to display the Ten Commandments. It's not easy getting the commandments placed in Texas courthouses. After all, posting Holy laws which ban lying, stealing and adultery creates a hostile work environment for lawyers.

• The Betty Ford Center announced expanded care for alcohol and substance abuse patients who need psychiatric therapy. I know first-hand at Betty Ford's they perform miracles you don't see in the Bible. They take alcoholics and drug addicts and in 28 days turn us into sex maniacs and overeaters.

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