Mistaken Identity | Fashion Victim

• Passengers on a Melbourne, Australia, commuter train dove under seats, cried and texted their loved ones when police locked down the Flagstaff Station in response to a report of a man with a rifle case acting suspiciously, according to the Associated Press.

As it turned out, Will Austin, a busker aboard the train, was performing breathing exercises in advance of playing his didgeridoo -- an indigenous wind instrument that Austin was carrying in a long bag.

Oblivious to police wearing body armor and carrying assault rifles, Austin admitted "I probably looked pretty suspicious, I suppose, just waltzing around and slowly walking out" before officers stopped him to search his bag.

Nothing to see here. [Associated Press, 3/28/2019]

• I hate when this happens: Jarred Randal Womack, 37, agreed to exchange pants with another man in Boulder, Colorado, but after the trade, he decided he didn't like the other man's pants after all, so Womack stabbed the man in the back.

Detectives investigating the incident later found the pants in question soiled with feces, which "could be the reason for the altercation," according to the police affidavit.

The Daily Camera reported that Womack was eventually charged with first-degree attempted murder, two counts of first-degree assault and robbery; the stabbing victim sustained life-threatening injuries. [Daily Camera, 1/25/2019]