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Jewish World Review May 11, 2004 / 20 Iyar, 5764

Andy Borowitz

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Consumer Reports

Poll: Majority can no longer recall why they liked "Friends"

Former fans mystified by show's appeal | Less than a week after the airing of the much-hyped finale of the series "Friends," former fans of the hit sitcom can no longer remember why they liked the show to begin with, a new poll reveals.

The survey, taken by the University of Minnesota's Institute of Public Opinion, shows that seventy-nine percent of former "Friends" fans could not name one thing they liked about the show, twenty-one percent said that they liked Jennifer Aniston's hair, and zero percent said they liked David Schwimmer.

"I find all of this rather surprising," said Dr. Ronald Frome, who conducted the survey, "except for the David Schwimmer part."

Dr. Frome said that the fact that former "Friends" fans are now thoroughly mystified by the show's appeal seems to dovetail with the results of another survey in which a wide majority agreed with the statement, "I never watched 'Sex and the City' voluntarily."

"According to that survey, a full ninety-eight percent of former 'Sex and the City' viewers watched it only because their spouse/partner forced them to," Dr. Frome said.

As for the new Olsen twins film "New York Minute," Dr. Frome said it was difficult to conclude whether people could remember anything they liked about the movie because, in his words, "We have so far been unable to locate anyone who has seen it."

In other entertainment news, Disney CEO Michael Eisner revealed that he decided not to distribute Michael Moore's new film because the movie alleged an unsubstantiated link between the Saudi royal family and Nemo.

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JWR Contributor Andy Borowitz, a former president of the Harvard Lampoon, is a regular humor columnist for, The New Yorker, The New York Times and TV Guide. Recognized by Esquire magazine as one of the most powerful producers in television, he was the creator and producer of the hit TV series The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and producer of the Oscar-nominated film Pleasantville. He is the author of the just released "Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison and "Trillionaire Next Door: The Greedy Investor's Guide to Day Trading" , "Rationalizations to Live By". Comments by clicking here. Visit his website by clicking here.


© 2004, Andy Borowitz