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Back in 1984, I got a job offer from a certain organization. I happened to be job hunting, so it should have been a no-brainer.
But the organization had a nasty reputation for being a firing line. I asked Rabbi Shlomo Freifeld, zt"l (d.1990), for advice and — great pragmatist that he was — he said, "So, you'll have a job for a while."
Sure enough, some months later, I was out.
When I told Reb Shlomo; he smiled and said, "I've been thrown out of better places." Nobody ever said parnassah (making a living) was easy.
Not to compare, but two centuries earlier, a poor fellow in Gritsa, Poland, really had a problem. You should never call anyone a lo-yutzlach (a loser); names like that have a way of becoming self-fulfilling prophesies. But since he's long gone, it's probably OK now.
And this guy's system was immune to money.
Reb Feivel, zy"a, the Rebbe of Gritsa, would always look for a down-to-earth solution to help people. He avoided pulling spiritual strings. But no matter what he tried for this fellow, it didn't work.
Finally, Reb Feivel saw no choice but to intercede in Heaven. To minimize the miraculous, he told the man to buy a lottery ticket and wait.
At that time in Poland, the way the lottery system worked was that someone would buy a ticket and there would be daily drawings for a week. After a few days, the man saw his ticket had not won and he panicked. He sold the ticket and, that day, his number won.
Reb Feivel reacted in anger — at himself. He took it as a sign from Heaven that he was not worthy. He "resigned" and told his Chassidim to find another Rebbe.
When his Rebbe, Reb Simcha Bunem of Parshischa, zy"a, (d. 1827) heard the story, he came to comfort Reb Feivel. And Reb Bunem told him, "You misread the sign. You are not unworthy. You just made a mistake. I also have people who come to me for help, but uch und vei tzu Bunem' l az er dint a G-t vos darf az ich zol Em zugn vi tzi helfn a Yid — Woe to Bunem, if he serves the Divine who needs me to tell him how to help a Jew. Just pray for him and let G-d decide what to do."
Chassidic lore is rich in Torah and tales of finding the balance between hishtadlus (practical effort) and realizing that everything comes from Heaven.
Reb Yitzchak of Vorka, zy"a,(d. 1848) used to give some money to anyone who recommended a shidduch (match) for his son. He felt that each recommendation was another step that got him closer to the goal.
One poor fellow in Vorka (Polish Jewry had a wealth of poor fellows) was blessed with a wife who told him, "Go to the Rebbe and recommend some person for a shidduch. At least you'll make a few groschen."
So, he went to the Rebbe and suggested a candidate.
But he didn't get the customary coins. And he burst out crying.
"Why are you crying?" the Rebbe asked. And he told the Rebbe what his wife had said. The Rebbe told him not to worry. Sure enough, the individual he suggested was the real shidduch, and he was paid the full shadchanus (matchmaking fee). This time of year is traditionally a season of blessing for parnassah and for shidduchim. What connection is there between money, marriage, and matzos? The Midrash (Bereishis Rabba 98) quotes Rav Yehoshua ben Levi, that earning a parnassah is as difficult as splitting the Red Sea. And the Talmud (Sotah 2a) quotes Rav Yochanan, "V'kasheh I'zavgan k'kriyas Yam Suf — matching a husband and wife is as difficult as splitting the Red Sea." How difficult was it for the Lord to split the Red Sea? What is "difficult" for Him?
Reb Bunem puts the whole thing into perspective. The difficulty was for the people, not for the Almighty. The Children of Israel escaped from Egypt and got as far as the sea — with the Egyptians close behind them. Now what? Everybody had their own ideas of how they might be saved. One thought they might fly over the water, another thought He would send them boats. Others simply despaired.
Nobody, but nobody, thought the water would split.
The same goes for parnassah: People think if I have this degree or make that investment, or go to that city … I'll make money. Yes, we have to make a legitimate hishtadlus. But, ultimately, the blessing comes from Above. And the same with shidduchim. Peoplemake checklists of requirements — this yeshivah or that school, or that much money. But the real match is decided from Above. I personaly know a woman who said she'd never marry a guy who was younger than her, or one who was shorter than her, or one who was from a specific city. Today, she and her husband — younger, shorter, and from that location — are, thank Heaven, happy great-grandparents. You may be too young to have heard the story of the boy who comes home from school and his father asks, "What did the rabbi teach you about Pesach?"
"Our Rebbi told us that the Jews came out of Esgypt and got to the banks of the Red Sea and the Egyptians caught right up to them. … They were trapped between the Egyptians and the sea with no way out. So the Lord sent the Marines with pontoon boats to rescue them."
"What?! … Is that what your Rebbi taught you?!" "Tatty (Daddy), if I tell you what my Rebbi taught us, you'd never believe it!"
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Mordechai Schiller is a copyeditor and columnist at Hamodia, the Daily Newspaper of Torah Jewry, where this first appeared.