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• Michelle Obama played the race card Monday, saying the mass deportation of illegal immigrants makes her fear for all people of color. She knows her own husband deported 3 million illegal aliens. The marriage can't last much longer once Michelle starts pointing out the ways in which he's half-white.
• Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez returned from her Fight the Oligarchy tour with Bernie Sanders this week, leaving her followers at fever pitch. Last night a socialist, a neo-Marxist and a Nihilist tried to enter the Comedy Store. The bouncer looked at their ID's and told them to come back when they are 21.
• Illinois Governor JD Pritkzer called for non-stop battle against Trump in a campaign-sounding speech in New Hampshire. His future is somewhat locked in. Illinois is the only state where by tradition the current governor rides around in a limo bearing license plates hand-made by the previous governor.
• CBS 60 Minutes interviewed University of North Carolina new Athletic Director and Super Bowl all-time winning coach Bill Belichick. Watching it, I couldn't believe he wore a torn sweatshirt to a nationally televised interview and millions of viewers. Who does he think he is, the president of Ukraine?
• Philadelphia Eagles MVP running back Shaquan Barkley played a round of golf with President Trump Sunday and caught grief from Democrats for associating with the enemy. Why can't sports be non-partisan? If the previous U.S. president invited me to play a round of golf, I'd say let's tee it up, Jill.
• Willie Nelson thanked his fans for their best birthday wishes on his 90th birthday Tuesday. He was happy to report that his throat infection has been completely cured. Last year, on orders from his physician, Willie switched from recreational marijuana to medical marijuana, and it cleared right up.
• President Trump signed an order restoring Columbus Day as a national holiday which honors the Italian explorer. It's for his historic 1492 sea voyage. Columbus thought he'd arrived in India when he landed in the Bahamas, another reason why to this day Italy has never won the America's Cup.
• The Denver Post reports that 100 illegal migrant gang members remain in ICE custody after a raid on an illegal nightclub in Colorado Springs Saturday. I looked everywhere at my place but I couldn't find my keys, and my maid told me to look harder. So I got some tattoos and a biker's helmet.
• San Antonio ICE agents surrounded an illegal alien who has deportation orders Tuesday after he climbed up a tree and refused to come down. Agents climbed up, seized him, brought him down and took him away. The next day, a U.S. District judge ordered the migrant be placed back up in the tree.
• Senate Democrats blasted Trump Tuesday for deporting illegal aliens without due process. They want legislation. Under the generous terms of last year's proposed bi-partisan Immigration Reform bill, any illegal migrant who's been in this country for at least two years will be right back with your entrĂ©e.
• The Supreme Court ruled migrant criminals be given their day in court before being returned to their home countries. But the language barrier is already proving to be an obstacle to due process. Today two MS-13 gangsters showed up for their deportation hearing in L.A. and the judge married them.
• President Trump touted the success of his border shutdown Tuesday in his 100 Days in Office speech. However, ICE said the border wall south of San Diego has been sawed through 18 times and in each case the Californians made it out. I predicted this a year ago when Mexico legalized cocaine.
• Los Angeles County workers hit the picket lines Tuesday as 50,000 city workers went on strike and blocked freeway entrances downtown. Yesterday the strike even forced the shutdown of Venice Beach bathrooms, forcing gay dating sites to recommend coffee shops as a place to meet instead.
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