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June 16th, 2025

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Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

Argus Hamilton

By Argus Hamilton

Published Jan. 22, 2025

Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

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Inauguration Day in Washington drew hundreds of millions of TV viewers worldwide. I loved all the pomp and pageantry we inherited from England. How often in our lives do we see one man inaugurated President of the United States, Viceroy of Panama and King of Greenland in one ceremony.

Joe Biden in his last 15 minutes in office Monday followed up on Hunter's pardon by pardoning his two brothers, his sister and brother-in-law. Joe's already home free. Back in November at the White House turkey pardon ceremony, the two turkeys looked at each other and agreed to just get this thing done.

President Trump signed executive orders Monday stopping illegal immigration at the border. He did, however, issue an order allowing 872 pre-processed refugees to enter the United States this week. Trump said the refugees will arrive in the U.S. on Wednesday and begin their modeling careers on Friday.

President Trump in his Inaugural Address drew a surprisingly loud cheer when he promised to make America healthy again. Although I jog daily and try to eat healthy, in case of an emergency I wear a Medic Alert Bracelet for my own protection. It reads Delete My Browser and Destroy My Phone.

President Biden in his Inaugural Address promised to bring down the prices of basic goods by unleashing America's oil and gas production. Buying food at the grocery store has become painful. When I was a kid there was so much toilet paper and eggs, we threw them at the houses of our enemies.

TikTok resumed service Sunday after Trump said he will work to try to achieve 50% American ownership of the platform with China. It's a contentious issue. If TikTok is banned, I'm moving to China where I can enjoy all the useless information and likely be celebrated on the streets as a giant.

President Trump is scheduled to visit the Los Angeles fire areas Friday. The mayor blamed the fires on her absence, the governor blamed the fires on climate change, the fire chief blamed the fires on the city council. To err is human, but to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.

The L.A. Times reported that thousands of homes burned to the ground in L.A. this month due to the incompetence of city hall and the inability of LAFD officials to get enough water to fight the wildfires. Democrats in Sacramento have all agreed on the solution. We're going to need more lesbians.

Washington, D.C. shook off a Sunday night snowstorm and bone-chilling cold front to stage the U.S. peaceful transfer of power in brilliant sunlight. The capital literally glistened. When the early morning Monday news reported there was snow all over Washington, out of habit Hunter Biden denied it was his.

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