Least Competent Criminals; Recurring Themes

• Police in Murfreesboro, North Carolina, announced in November that they had intercepted a shipment of 30 pounds of marijuana that had been loosely packaged and shipped from California by U.S. Mail, and an investigation was underway with arrests expected. Police Chief Darrell Rowe told WTKR-TV that the scent of the packages was so vivid that, even though he had summoned the department's K-9 unit, "the dog kind of looked at us (as if to say), 'Do you really need me for this?'" [WTKR-TV (Hampton Roads, Va.), 11-11-2014]

• (1) Most recent drunk driver to hit a pedestrian with the victim's body then lodging in the windshield -- and the driver's traveling on, seemingly oblivious: Marcos Ortega, 33, in Ocean Township, New Jersey, in November (whose 66-year-old victim did not survive). (2) Most recent report of birds in the wild consuming fermenting berries -- and then comically crashing into trees and making goofy-looking landings: Bohemian waxwings in Canada's Yukon, in November (where the Environment Yukon organization set up an "avian drunk tank"). [WPVI-TV (Philadelphia), 11-12-2014] [Canadian Broadcasting Corp. News, 11-17-2014]

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