In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review May 20, 2013/ 11 Sivan, 5773

There's no place like home --- especially when it's a mess

By Betsy Hart

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | My house has never looked better. In fact, I've never seen it like this. Every single room is perfectly tidy. There is no clutter anywhere. Every paint scratch has been touched up, every floor is clean. Every dish is put away, and each hairdryer and similar appliance (with three girls, I have a lot of them) has its cord carefully wound and is "just so" on the shelf.

My paperwork is neatly sorted and stacked. The computer area where the kids sit has the chairs properly tucked in under the table. All papers, candy wrappers and school-related stuff have disappeared. The built-in lockers -- one for each of my four children -- are perfectly arranged, as is the coatroom itself.

Pictures -- but not too many -- are displayed attractively. The furniture is perfectly situated on just-shampooed carpets, with some extraneous pieces having been removed. Beds are made; no towels are anywhere but where they should be. The laundry is all done and put away on shelves in the appropriate closets.

Oh, and the bathrooms are clean, shiny and organized.

This should all last until my kids get home from school today!

I am, of course, not hallucinating as I share this. I am showing my house to prospective renters. (At the end of the school year, my kids and I are joining my new husband at last, in his lovely home some 40 minutes away.)

In fact, by the time you read this it could be rented out. I hope so. I can't live like this for long. It's not natural. It can't be healthy.

Right now it's like some weird, neat-freak family lives here. Or doesn't really "live" here, but just sort of hovers here. There's no stuff. No mess. No chaos.

There's no personality.

Over the years, I've never been accused of being a good housekeeper. I suppose I could blame it on being a single working mom to four young kids, but that's not fair. It will deteriorate when they walk in the door today because I will let it. Plain and simple.

A dear friend tried to give me a pass a few years ago when she walked in one day and, as usual, my house looked like a tornado hit it. She said, "I think this is your way of saying, 'Hey, I may look like I have it all together on the outside, people, but I really don't!' "

Gee, I thought it was just my way of saying I'd rather do anything but clean and organize. In other words, I'm the one to blame.

I have been accused of being a good decorator, and making sure each inch of space is tastefully finished. I was explaining this recently to a friend. I said, "It's very hard for me to live in any space that is not finished to fairly exacting standards. I have to know that under the mess of the moment, the place secretly looks really great!"

Ah, the challenge is that in showing a house it needs to look really great. Period. And so a few months ago, the process began. The tossing, the packing up, the giving away. I wrote recently about how, as I began that process, it evoked memories. And that there are some things I probably should get rid of, but for sentimental reasons can't.

Then there are the things that I want to get rid of, but in the interest of time just couldn't. That's when a trip to the hardware store, and the purchase of several opaque plastic bins hours before the first showing, came into play. And that's precisely where a lot of the clutter is sitting. Stacked neatly along the wall. In the garage.

Like I said, I hope it rents soon and we and our stuff can go to our new home and start sharing the chaos there. Living like we are now for any length of time is unimaginable.

I briefly thought, after the first time my house was "perfect" for a showing, that I really liked it that way. But when real life and real mess begin to creep back in when the kids get home from school, I'll have to admit: I like the place a lot better this way. Because that's when it feels most like home.

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