In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review July 28, 2005 / 21 Tammuz, 5765

Divorce me from these weddings

By Lenore Skenazy

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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Did I drag you along on my honeymoon? Insist you come with us to Mexico and laugh by the pool? Did I ask you to drain your savings, beg your boss for time off and warn you that I would be eternally offended if you didn't come?

Of course not. How rude! But that's just what thousands of couples are doing today. Only thing is, they don't call these events "honeymoons." They call them "destination weddings."

The idea, however, is the same: A couple discovers an exotic locale where they want to begin their married life. But instead of getting hitched in some convenient location and then jetting off, they invite their loved ones to join them on Maui or Martinique or Mars for the pleasure of attending their nuptials.

Naturally, the couples don't think they are being inconsiderate. They think they are offering their guests a dream vacation that just happens to be their dream on the guests' vacation time. And dime.

Those of us less starry-eyed are starting to see red. A letter to Harriet Cole, New York Daily News advice columnist, put it bluntly: The writer's New York nephew had decided to get married in Italy. Weren't the bride and groom obliged to help pay their guests' way?

Harriet's answer: No. Which is a pity, because this selfish scenario is growing.

"We did a survey recently," says Diane Forte, editor of Bridal Guide, "and, gosh, 24.3% of our readers — that's a LOT of readers — say they are planning or considering a destination wedding." Forte assumes most of them got the idea by seeing celebrities slip off to remote resorts to wed. Pretty soon workaday couples started thinking that they, too, deserved a People magazine-worthy affair.

Go to any wedding planning Web site and you'll be flooded with talking points pushing this trend: Destination weddings allow the couple to spend days with family and friends. Planning an event so far away keeps family meddling to a minimum. (Yes, the same family that the couple is looking forward to spending days and days with.)

Somehow an "I do" under the palms is considered more original than an "I do" at the parish.

But, most saliently, destination weddings are actually cheaper than local ones.

For the people throwing the wedding, that is.

Whereas stateside nuptials can run $40,000, weddings in picturesque poverty cost far less. And considering the guest list gets pared, that's less again.

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Tammra Radford wanted a destination wedding for just those reasons. The whole affair in St. Thomas would cost the same as the catering alone in her hometown of Detroit, she says. Plus, when the guests left, she and her husband would already be on their honeymoon.

"But he said, 'No,'" she said, smiling to her new husband.

"I wanted everybody in my family to be at the wedding," Rodney Radford said simply. He promised his wife a lovely, local wedding instead.

Now Tammra is extremely glad that's what she got — particularly because a hurricane was heading for St. Thomas on the day they would have been wed there.

Which is not to say that fate frowns on destination weddings. Just that most of us maxed-out, vacation-limited, don't-wanna-sip-daiquiris-for-four-days-with-your-maid-of-honor invitees sure do.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Lenore Skenazy is a columnist for The New York Daily News. Comment by clicking here.

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