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Jewish World Review June 6, 2007 / 20 Sivan, 5767 Cloudy Days on Sesame Street By Lenore Skenazy
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Hey, kids! "Sesame Street" is releasing some of its greatest hits to the iTunes Store just in time for summer. Now you can spend your sunny days feeling anxious and depressed just like a real grown-up.
C is for cholesterol, that's good enough for me
C is for cholesterol, ask any ol' M.D.
C is for cholesterol, it clogs each ar-ter-y
Cardiovascular problems start with C!
"The Slippery Slope Snack Song" (to "Frere Jacques")
Are you sneaking, are you sneaking
Post-nap snack? Post-nap snack?
First comes Goldfish chewing
Pretty soon you're doing
Toot and smack, toot and smack.
"Hush Little Healthy Eating Baby"
Hush little baby, don't say a word
Mama's gonna buy you organic bean curd
And if that bean curd makes you stressed,
Mama's gonna take you for an allergy test
And if that allergy test says you're OK,
Mama's gonna lay off lactose anyway
And if that lactose-free diet leaves you hungry
Mama's gonna supplement with locally produced honey
And if that local honey gives you diabetes
Mama's gonna buy you a bowl of Wheaties
And if that bowl of Wheaties tastes dry
Mama's gonna give you some soy milk to try
And if that soy milk makes you hurl
You'll still be the cutest lactose-free, locally grown, wholly organic, borderline diabetic baby in the world.
"The There's No Such Thing As Water Safety Song"
Michael float your boat near shore, Hallelujah.
Drownings peak at age of 4, Hallelujah.
Put on goggles, the water stings, Hallelujah
Don't forget your water wings, Hallelujah.
"Take Me Out to the New, Non-Competitive Ballgame"
Take me out to the ballgame
For cooperative fun!
Buy me some sunscreen so I won't burn
I just hope that we all get a turn!
For it's root, root, root for the two teams
Whoever wins it's the same all the same
'Cause we Don't! Keep! Score! anymore
At the new ball game.
"If You're Hyper and You Know It"
If you're AD and you're HD clap your hands,
If you're AD and you're HD clap your hands,
If you're feeling kind of antsy
There's a word for it that's fancy
If you're AD and you're HD clap your hands. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment on JWR contributor Lenore Skenazy's column by clicking here. © 2007, Creators Syndicate |
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