In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

By Shannon Symonds

Do you ever wonder if aliens have taken over your toddler's body? Is going to the store like going far far away from sanity? Learn why toddlers tantrum and what to do about it. | I dressed my toddler like a little lady and took her shopping for a wedding gift in a shop full of glass and crystal. She reached out to touch something sparkly and I panicked, "No! Don't touch!" I said quickly and firmly as I reached for her. SMACK! She threw herself flat on her back on the hard floor. The sound I heard was her curly head hitting the ground like a melon.

She writhed like she was possessed by an alien. Every head in the busy store turned, and when she opened her mouth the sound that came out wasn't human."She does this," I tried to explain to the other shoppers as I scooped her flailing body off the floor and rushed out the door. Within a few minutes the screaming had stopped, her nose was wiped and it was as if the possession by aliens had passed. But, as a mother I now had Post Tantrum Stress Disorder. I was sure the alien was waiting inside my little darling for the next time we were in a public place.

Later, I was able to attend a training on how children's brains develop. I was thrilled to learn that my toddler was normal, not possessed by aliens, and that someday life on my mother ship would return to normal. Here is what I learned. The good news, our children have brains. The bad news is when our children are born their brains are still rapidly developing and will continue to develop as they grow. Being half-baked creates behavior challenges. Each child's brain has:

  • An old brain or an area where instincts are housed.
  • An area of the brain that controls the urge to fight, take flight or freeze when frightened.
  • A storage area for memory.
  • An area for problem solving.
  • An area of the brain that controls emotions and behavior also called the Prefrontal Cortex. This is the last area of the brain to develop.

All of these areas in the brain communicate with each other. When a child enters a full-blown tantrum, communication can shut down between the areas of your child's brain. What does that mean to you? It means that if you are trying to talk and reason with a tantrumming child, it is probably not getting in at all. They may not remember a word you say. Not only are their brains not taking in what you are saying, they probably don't understand how they are feeling or what they are upset about.


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Children have fears about the world and what they don't comprehend. They may feel like flushing the toilet is sending away a part of themselves or that when you put on a mask you magically become a monster. Toddlers do not understand "pretend" versus "real."

An article published on called, "Toddler Temper Tantrums" explains what happens in a toddler's brain when they have a full-blown tantrum or alien possession. This feeling of heightened arousal causes the body to release cortisol, known as the "fight or flight" hormone. Maybe it should be called "tantrum juice." Cortisol increases blood pressure, speeds up breathing rates and may lead to confused or unclear thinking. (Sound like anyone you know?) This anxiety is developmentally typical in moderation. So, knowing that your child's brain is having a short meltdown and that during his alien possession he is not thinking clearly, what can you do to comfort and help your child?

  • First, work on regulating your own breathing, body language and tone. Your calm demeanor can be contagious. Model how you want your child to be. Children often mirror our behavior.

  • If your child is flailing, arms and legs flying, don't get hurt and don't let her hurt herself. Keep a safe space or timeout spot in your home. If you are able, place your child there until she is calm. If she is yelling at you, let her know you can't hear her until she talks nicely.

  • Hold your child or be near your child until his breathing has slowed, his eyes are open, and he seems to be 'present' or aware of his surroundings. Speak softly and calmly until you can tell he is able to listen.

  • When your child begins to be present and aware, it is time to teach her. Using a calm and soft tone explain to her what you need. For example, "I would love to buy you all the toys in the store, but I can't. I need you to help me by being good while I shop so we can get food for our dinner." Focus on what you want to see or have her do.

  • After the tantrum, give your child a direction he can understand. For example, "Hold my hand in the store."

  • If the tantrum is prolonged and accompanied by nightmares or other behaviors seek professional help.

    Howcast video, "How to deal with a screaming child while shopping,"gives excellent step-by-step instructions for handling your own shopping alien invasion. Finally, if you have Post Tantrum Stress Disorder, remember this will pass.

    As children grow older, are better able to communicate and have further brain development, the tantrums will end. Or at least you will get a break until it is time for them to borrow the keys to your car.

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    Shannon Symonds worked 14 years as an Advocate for families experiencing Domestic or Sexual abuse while raising 6 children in Seaside Oregon. She loves to laugh, write, run, paint and most of all play with her family and friends

    © 2014, FamilyShare