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Jewish World Review
June 18, 2010
/ 6 Tamuz 5770
Truthers, roosters and Birthers -- oh my!
From Tea Parties to Swifties, Enablers to Blamers, Warmers to Deniers, a plethora of
conspiracy groups have formed recently. Here are a few of the more popular ones and
My psychiatrist told me, "For the tenth time, Weinbaum,
you're not paranoid!" I replied, "So, you're one of them!"
First, the truthers:
Theory: Those who believe the Bush Administration participated in or knew in
advance of the 9/11 attacks and stood down in order to gain power and
override Constitutional protections. This would give Bush the green light to
invade Iraq and Afghanistan to guarantee a future oil supply to the USA . It was
done with a controlled demolition which happened to coincide with the Jets
crashing into the buildings.
- Typical Accusation: "To say that we don't know it (WTC Building Seven)
imploded…is beyond ignorant." Rosie O'Donnell.
- Evidence: Popular Science dismissed the above and concluded the collapse of
the buildings were fire-gravity induced from the jets and fuel, including a
"volcanic eruption," like the crashing down of debris from Building One into
- Believers: Ed Asner, Charlie Sheen, Rosie O'Donnell, Former Obama Green
Jobs Czar and admitted Communist Van Jones, Ralph Nader, Cynthia
McKinney, Jesse Ventura, and any Islamic Fanatics who, after trying to convict
Israel of the 9/11 attacks, pointed their fingers at Bush….and Cheney too.
Then came the Roosters:
Theory: Evil, imperialistic atom bomb annihilators of Hiroshima and Nagasaki
America deserved the attacks on 9/11.
- Evidence: A ridiculous concept that the US , the most giving nation in the history
of man, is evil.
- Advocates include: Reverend Jeremiah Wright, Barack Hussein Obama and all
in his cabinet, his 40 czars and most of the Dem party.
- Accusation: " America 's chickens have come home to roost!" "…G-d damn
America ! It's in the Bible!" The bad Reverend Jeremiah Wright. Or as fellow
Rooster, Obama seems to be saying with his policies: Thank you Osama, we
The 2008 election brought out the Birthers.
Theory: those who believe Obama's lack of an official Birth Certificate means
he's ineligible to serve.
- Evidence: Only a certified copy of Obama's "Certification of Live Birth" was
released by the Obama Campaign. Three of these cases have been dismissed
by the Supreme Court.
- Advocates: Alan Keyes, Michael Savage, the Obama Nation author, Jerome
- Used in a sentence: "Somewhere in Kenya there's a village that's lost its idiot."
"We're getting ready for the Communist takeover of America with a non-citizen
at the helm." Michael Savage, according to Wikipedia.
This last one is a bonus, but only because it didn't mesh with the Wizard of Oz-like
title of the article.
After the election and 1.5 years into Obama's term, we have the blamers.
Theory: It was Bush's fault!
- Evidence: Bush was the president before Obama. Our president is obsessed
with blaming his predecessor for all his problems and failings. Eisenhower
planned the Bay of Pigs invasion of Cuba and JFK failed to execute it. Not
once did Kennedy try and blame Ike for the fiasco.
- Advocates: Barack Obama, his administration the Democratic Congress, Helen
Thomas and, until very recently, the rest of the Main Stream Media.
- Used in a sentence: "We inherited a mess!" heard about a gazillion times in
Obama's speeches, interviews and press conferences throughout his entire
administration. "Obama inherited a mess." Pick almost anyone of the flaming
Sometimes you have to rock the captain to save the boat
Apparently Obama has clicked his ruby shoes three times and ordered, "Pass cap and
tax or else." Even the Dems are saying, "Not so much."
Hey Obamaites, it could be worse. There could be a group called the Impeachers.
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JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum hosts DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Dave Weinbaum
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