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Jewish World Review
May 1, 2009
/ 7 Iyar 5769
Barack gets Pelosi to invoke the I'm stoopid defense
I have concluded we have a president that is so into the Moveon.org, "Crap-on America" crowd that he will do anything at their beck and call, while the rest of us poor "rednecks" (or in my case a "Joosier") protests.
President Obama's lefty mentors, think his election commands him to arraign the Bush Administration.
While Barack's out there flipping the thumbs up, down and sideways RE: Bushie trials, he has to make sure he can persecute…I mean prosecute without implicating Congressional Dem leaders who were briefed on enhanced interrogation techniques by DOJ lawyers. Obama needs these leaders, at least until he can make himself El Presidente for Life.
The Obama people have entered through the back alley and are conjuring whether Pelosi, Reid and ilk have even a remote excuse. There's no denying that these dunderheads were in the room while briefed by the Bush Administration soon after the confusion of 9/11. The question is how tight their heads were attached while the briefings were taking place?
Below is what appears to be a defense-in-work for House Speaker Nancy Pelosi per her speech of denial last week:
Too busy hitting on Arlen Spector.
Face lift froze smile, but was frowning inside.
The cheesecake she ate earlier was spiked with ecstasy.
Silicon inexplicably rose from "other" regions and blocked ears.
Trying to adjust hairpiece mistaken for yes vote.
Eating tuna sandwiches from family-owned factory caused temporary insanity via mercury poisoning.
Distracted by leg tingling while daydreaming of Obama.
Electro-magnetic waves sent from Darth Vad…I mean Dick Cheney.
Colorful scarf wrapped too tight around neck causing temporary black out.
Slurpee from Dem run senate cafeteria froze brain.
CIA spooks gave her the heebee geebees.
In super secret vote on briefing, told to blink if she disagreed with water boarding. With that much Botox, she literally didn't have the nerve.
Wonder how it's going with the rest of the Dems that were in the briefing. Seems like a hard sell that being present, these supposedly intelligent leaders of the US Congress could mass co-confess to the type of illiteracy they rail to eliminate in the third world...and Detroit. Thus, here-in lies the mission of the moment from the Prince of Arrogance AKA President Barack Hussein Obama.
Let's play Truth and Consequences!
If Obama tries the Bush administration:
It'll please all the America-hating countries in the world.
His presidency will replace fixing the economy with ruining those he has replaced.
It'll sink this country into the third world habit of each new government, thinking its first 100 days will be graded on how many of the previous administrations' personnel they can perp walk.
Our allies will be embarrassed and our enemies amazed as to how stupid we are.
Islamic terrorists will feel obligated to attack us.
Who in their right minds would want to serve in ANY administration or if already serving, render ANY opinion at all?
Bill and Hillary were accused of many felonies, including lying under oath (Bill admitted his guilt), obstruction of justice, treason, influence peddling to foreign countries and rape.
Gerald Ford pardoned Richard Nixon.
Truman would be strung up for dropping A-bombs on Japan. Some would want to try him for supporting Israel's independence, but that's another story.
The crimes of the Vietnam War under JFK, LBJ, and Nixon.
FDR bombed Dresden for the sole purpose of killing civilians. Roosevelt incarcerated thousands of US citizens of Japanese descent, men, women and children, in concentration camps for the entire war.
Heck, even Honest Abe threw the reporters in jail!
Yep, let's try 'em all! Hang 'em high!
If they run out of jail space, Gitmo will be terrorist-free in a few months.
President Obama said he was going forward, but apparently he's so weak he's determined to run his presidency while looking in his rear-view mirror, invoking the magic word "Bush" as he runs away…from his own policies.
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JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum, originally from Chicago, is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic. He resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here.
© 2005, Dave Weinbaum