May 25, 2012 Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Thinking About Faith Mark Clayton: Is Hillary's State Dept. hacking Al Qaeda? Not quite David G. Savage: Supreme Court limits protection against double jeopardy Ashley Powers: A nightmare, then conviction is tossed Erika Bolstad: Temple cancels Wasserman Schultz speech Deroy Murdock: WWII hero Karski to receive U.S. Medal of Freedom Kimberly Lankford: Health Coverage for College Grads New therapy helps tinnitus sufferers Solar Impulse takes off on first intercontinental flight without using a drop of fuel The Kosher Gourmet by Ethel G. Hofman: The former president of the International Association of Culinary Professionals, whose members included the likes of Julia Child, is back with contemporary Shavous cuisine: Ruby Fruit Soup, Sweet Noodle Kugel with Cheese, Key Lime Curd, Calsone Casserole Frittata with Wild Mushrooms, Sun-dried tomatoes and Olives, Baked Tilapia with Pepper Cheese Cream and Brown Sugar Shortbread May 24, 2012 Jeff Jacoby: The peace process battered Israel's reputation Near-nuclear nation threatens to walk out of summit unless it gets its way Clifford D. May: What Iran's Rulers Want Michael Muskal: 'Pro-choice' position hits record low, according to poll Chris Farrell: Are We in a Tech Bubble? Kimberly Lankford: Switching Medicare Advantage Plans Mid-Year Bryan McIver, M.B., Ch.B., Ph.D.: Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Understanding hyperthyroidism and its variety of treatment options French rights groups want Google to stop suggesting 'Jew' Two-fly rule for Beijing toilets The Kosher Gourmet by Penelope Wall: PHILLY CHEESE STEAKS --- hold the steak! May 23, 2012 Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: Baghdad talks highlight Western naivete Putin's latest defiance shows Obama's whisper didn't work Tony Pugh: More private colleges offering tuition discounts Lisa Gerstner: 4 Money-Etiquette Questions Answered Mary Beth Franklin: How to Choose the Right Annuity for You Art Markman, Ph.D.: Get smart: How to bulk up your creativity muscles Israeli scientists use skin cells to help repair heart muscle Tina Susman: The wig wasn't enough: Man gets 13 years for posing as his dead mom The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen:A simple way to do fish right May 22, 2012 David S. Cloud and Kathleen Hennessey: Obama changes mind on Pakistan invite to NATO summit --- and then gets dissed by country's president US Senate approves new sanctions against Iran ahead of Baghdad talks Warren Richey: Can US group challenge overseas surveillance act? Supreme Court to decide Supreme Court: Twins can't claim dead dad's benefits Thomas M. Anderson: Walking Away From a Mortgage Environmental Nutrition editors: The lowdown on a low-acid diet Pomegranate juice maker used deceptive ads, FTC judge rules Relatives outraged over spoof on Hamas chief's killing The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: Enjoy a celebration of the most rich and layered flavors: Black bean, sweet potato and quinoa chili May 21, 2012 Mark Clayton: Cybersecurity: How US utilities passed up chance to protect their networks Howard LaFranchi: NATO summit: Who will foot the bill for long-term Afghanistan security? Chris Farrell : Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF James K. Glassman: 5 Stock Picks Among Online Retailers Stephen Whiteside, Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Social anxiety disorder --- or just shy? Guy Jackson : Victim's father regrets death of Lockerbie bomber The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: Famed chef's veal shoulder farsumagru: A festive meat course for late spring May 18, 2012 Rabbi Berel Wein: Striving: The People of the Book's Book for (All of) the People Caroline B. Glick: Embracing dangerous delusions and not our friends Steven Goldberg: 5 Great Stock Picks and the Exchange-Traded Fund that Owns Them Janet Bodnar: How to Teach Kids to Handle Credit Cards Mary Pickett, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Don't be forced into gluten-free lifestyle based merely on a doctor's false-positive test The Kosher Gourmet by Carolyn Malcoun: DIY healthy lunchbox treats: HOMEMADE FRUIT BARS for kids and brown-bagging adults alike May 17, 2012 Warren Richey: Teacher fired for being unwed and pregnant can sue religious school, court rules Josh Mitnick: Netanyahu's 'centrist' coalition is already proving it's anything but Steven Goldberg: Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF Mary Beth Franklin: Retirement Savings Tips for New Grads Amina Khan: Research links coffee to lower death rates Chelsea Sheasley: Social media: Is it too feminine? The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Duran : Cheesy Potato Breakfast Casserole with Cheddar and Sun-Dried Tomatoes May 16, 2012 Jackson Holahan: The Aleppo Codex Jonathan Tobin : Iran Declares Victory in Nuclear Talks Kiplinger Reports, Summarized Anne Kates Smith: 7 Stocks That Let You Sleep Tight Carmen Terzic, M.D., Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: A variety of exercises can help improve balance Melissa Healy: National strategy on Alzheimer's disease aims to halt it by 2025 The Kosher Gourmet by Joyce White : GOODNESS GRACIOUS: GREENS! 4 winning recipes that are no longer just for down-home folks (Includes expert tips & techniques) May 15, 2012 Dennis Prager: God and Man at (and for) Liberty Kristen Chick: Obama administration resumes arms sales to Bahrain despite serious unresolved human rights issues. Activists feel abandoned Pat Mertz Esswein: Homes are now affordable again and mortgage rates are low. What you need to know before you buy Kathy Kristof: Our Practical Investor Fights Inflation with These 6 Investments Sue Hubbard, M.D.: The Kid's Doctor: Lactose intolerant young child? Check again Environmental Nutrition Editors: Get the facts on palm sugar sweetening The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Hunt: Spread a Little Excitement with EXOTIC CONDIMENTS (4 RECIPES) May 14, 2012 Richard Simon: Purple Hearts for domestic terror victims? Nando Pelusi, Ph.D.: The privacy paradox: Surrounded by strangers, we risk isolation, anxiety Chris Farrell: Investing Lessons from the Great Recession Lisa Gerstner: How to Protect Your Identity, Finances If You Lose Your Phone Harvard Health Letters: Heart disease and dementia Tiffany O'Callaghan: New hormone mimics effects of exercise without the sweat The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: MANGO COCONUT OAT MORNING MUFFINS are a bright but hearty delight May 11, 2012 Rabbi B. Shafier: Why happiness will always be elusive Charles Krauthammer: Echoes of '67: Israel unites Howard LaFranchi: With G8 snub, US-Putin 'reset' off to stumbling start Jeremy J. Siegel: Investors, Relax About Rising Interest Rates Jessica L. Anderson: Get the Best Deal on a Used Car Jett Stone: Forget face-lifts and fake knees. Scientists have seen the fountain of youth --- and it's broccoli The Kosher Gourmet by Chef Mario Batali: The famed chef's vegetable dish that tastes true to the season: FAVAS AND SUGAR SNAP PEAS WITH POTATOES AND TARRAGON May 10, 2012 Clifford D. May: The Real Palestinian Refugee Problem Sergei L. Loiko: Putin sends warning to U.S., NATO in Victory Day speech at Red Square Mary Rourke: How being a 'mentch' got Vidal Sasoon his start and fighting in Israel's War of Independence provided him with confidence and a strong sense of his own identity Harvard Health Letters: Palliative care: Underused therapy yields surprising benefits Jeff Bertolucci: Get Home Phone Service for Less Than $10 a Month Rachel L. Sheedy and Susan B. Garland : Make the Right Moves to Boost Benefits The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Gleaming with its golden, crimson, and snowy white hues, this silken smooth and creamy STRAWBERRY ORANGE TRIFLE looks impressive, but is easy to prepare May 9, 2012 John Rosemond: Parents, stop destroying the American male Valerie J. Nelson: Maurice Sendak, author of 'Where the Wild Things Are,' dies at 83 Bob Frick: Angst Over Annuities Sharon Palmer, R.D. How you can reduce your risk -- or delay -- chronic diseases associated with aging Howard LeWine, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Why did my blood pressure suddenly shoot up? Lisa Gerstner: Lower the Rate on All Your Loans The Kosher Gourmet by Emily Ho : Springtime soba with miso sauce offers a coloful mix of fresh textures and flavors May 8, 2012 Edmund Sanders: Netanyahu suddenly cancels new elections, forms unity government Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: Farewell to European superstate Anne Kates Smith: 4 Stocks That Mimic Buffett and Berkshire Hathaway Gaia Vince and Clare Wilson The Rise of Miniature Medical Robots: Fantasy Fast Becoming Reality Paul Takahashi, M.D.: Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Never suffer night leg cramps Jessica L. Anderson: Extended-Warranty Warning The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Celebrate National Chocolate Chip Day with the Best Cookie Ever (Includes techniques) May 7, 2012 Mark Clayton: Homeland Security warns major cyber attack aimed at gas pipeline industry underway Angus Roxburgh: Putin Decoded: World view of a Russian feeling dissed Kimberly Lankford: Navigate a Course for Long-Term Care Kevin McCormally How to Adjust Your Tax Withholding Celeste Robb-Nicholson, M.D.: Harvard Health Letters: How do you treat a Baker's cyst? Joanne Capano: Healthy Snacks for Children: The Choices May Surprise You The Kosher Gourmet by Penelope Wall: Classic Creamy Spinach Dip with a Fraction of the Calories and Fat May 4, 2012 Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Holy 'trivialities' Jonathan Tobin: Bibi v. Barak will be no contest this time around Steven Goldberg: Blue Chip Stocks On Sale Worldwide Art Pine Slow Productivity Growth a Blessing --- For Now Sue Hubbard, M.D. : The Kid's Doctor: Are Kids Too Wired? Kerri-Ann Jennings, M.S., R.D: Foods that are good for your smile Amy Paturel, M.S., M.P.H.: Eating Well: Foods that are good for your smile The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Strawberry rhubarb parfaits are elegant yet simple to assemble May 3, 2012 Michael Freund: Who's Afraid of the Messiah? Clifford D. May: The Foggiest War Susan B. Garland: Insurance to Cover Old Old Age Steven Goldberg 6 Reasons to Bet on a Big Bull Market Harvard Health Letters: Treating prostate cancer --- no rush to judgment Larry Gordon: Harvard, MIT partner to offer free online courses Naomi Nix : Man gets free trip to Chicago after postcard sent by mother in 1957 finally reaches him The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Intensely Italian vegetable frittata is a seriously simple standby

Jewish World Review Feb. 22, 2010 / 8 Adar 5770 A Leap in Cow Control By Dave Barry http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | People always ask me: How come the newspaper prints so much bad news? How come the front page always has negative headlines like: "Freak Espresso Machine Explosion Destroys Crowded Starbucks"? Why don't we print stories with a positive slant, like: "Destroyed Starbucks Was Popular Gathering Place for Lawyers"? Well, OK, then. You want good news? We got yer good news right here, starting with this: EXCITING ADVANCE IN LIVESTOCK FLATULENCE. As you know if you have ever stood outdoors in the Midwest, cows give off methane gas. We don't know why. Maybe they're bored. Maybe they're trying to spoil our appetite for hamburgers. All we know is, scientists believe that methane is a major factor in global warming. For the record, I have a friend named Doris who argues, on good authority, that the biggest single cause of global warming is menopause. Also, I recently received a letter from a reader who theorizes that global warming may be related to the alarming increase in pizza ovens, especially in New Jersey. But methane is surely a factor, and cows produce a lot of it. That's why we should all be very excited about the recent scientific discovery concerning—I am not making this up—kangaroo flatulence. According to news articles sent in by many alert readers, scientists in Australia have found that even though kangaroos eat the same grasses as cows, they produce no methane. The question that springs to mind, of course, is: How did the scientists conduct this research? It cannot be easy to collect emission samples from a non-domesticated animal that can travel 40 mph, leap 30 feet at a single bound AND punch. I'm guessing the task of gathering kangaroo gas samples fell to some rookie scientist ("OK, Sedgwick: Here's a jar, a helmet and a pogo stick. Now get out there and win one for the planet!"). So anyway, now the Australian scientists are trying to figure out how the kangaroos manage to be methane-free. They think the answer may be one of the 40 types of bacteria they have identified in the kangaroo's stomach. I don't even want to THINK about how they collected those samples. ("OK, Sedgwick: Here's a jar, a rope and a snorkel.") The scientists plan to isolate the anti-methane bacterium in the kangaroo's stomach, then see what happens when they put this same bacterium into the stomachs of cows. Speaking as a layperson concerned about the future of my planet (Earth), I just want to say to these scientists, in humble gratitude: ARE YOU INSANE?? What if the bacterium causes the cows to develop other kangaroo characteristics? And what if these modified cows escape from Australia? It would be like the killer bees, only much worse: "WISCONSIN—Weary National Guard troops continued to battle a rampaging herd of bacteria-enhanced Australian kangaroo cows that have been bounding around this heartland state, soaring over fences with moos of derision and punching their way into grain silos." So there is a certain risk involved in the Australian research. But however it works out, I think we can all agree on one thing: "The Moos of Derision" would be a good name for a rock band. And speaking of good, our next piece of good news, which was sent in by about 19 billion alert readers, concerns a Butler, Pa., company that is making a: MACHINE GUN-EQUIPPED SUV. Yes! According to an Associated Press article, a company called Ibis Tek is modifying "sport" utility vehicles to accept machine guns, which are fired via a joystick inside the car. These are mostly sold to foreigners; to have one in the U.S., you need a permit from the federal government, which requires you to have a good reason. Fortunately, I do: I drive in Miami. I am tired of having nothing but a puny horn to alert the 258-year-old driver in the Oldsmobile ahead of me that the green arrow pointing left means you can turn left now ... c'mon please turn .. TURN LEFT PLEASE C'MON C'MON HURRY UP IT'S GONNA CHANGE OH NOOOOO. I think the federal government would have to agree that this is a situation where a friendly warning burst of several thousand .50-caliber rounds would be a big help to traffic flow. The Ibis Tek people also offer an option for a grenade launcher, but I think that would be overkill, don't you? Unless those cows show up. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. Comment by clicking here. Previously: Not Exactly Razor-Sharp Offensive weapons On The Swing Shift Valley of the Dolls Discourse on the ‘Course’ Waging Germ Warfare Sanity, Now Departing This is Funny, Trust Us Mindless in Mickeytown Flight 573 Now Boding Dakota: Just a Snow Job? Cyberspace Cadet The adult idea of reining in kids goes up in smoke Eat All That You Can Eat It's late in the season, and I'm batting about .200 When it comes to yard work, I have ants in my pants Accordion players are squeezing me for an apology I have strong scientific evidence that men and women are different I call this work 'Sad Ballad of a Clueless Idiot' When it comes to shopping, I'm the big Cheez-It Kids better wise up, or they're doomed to repeat The Mother of All Parties Summertime, and the livin' can get a bit fishy The best summertime vacation is a good ol' staycation It's summer and the Bridezillas are in full bloom America's space cadets have an idea that's completely outside the box This party animal is following the yellow brick road My diet plan is a surefire way to lose your spouse Here's a vacation the kids won't forget anytime soon I'd rather read about walnuts than Britney Spears Birthday pinata duty has me feeling a little batty Can't we all just get along? Are you a meshugena? I've got a few pet peeves about sea creatures Some common grammar queries axed and answered Grads, the world is your oyster — and it's shut It's Barbie's world — the rest of us just live here 35 years later, it's a flight of the conned chords Trout fishing makes me blooping crazy Duct-tape daredevils When it comes to buying, my wife shops — and I drop I've found a guy who can write this column better me After all these years, still not ready for my closeup Let's watch out for those conjugal phrases A trip to North Dakota puts me on the map Kicking and hugging This dad has a severe case of wedding belle blues Thanks to the British, I've suffered another art attack My vocabulary is just teeming with synergy A brief emergency It's time for me to come clean about my dirty ways A ruff and ready playmate Sticking it to bad drivers The gravity of skiing Warning: DO NOT READ WHILE SLEEPING! I had fun, fun, fun till someone took my Vega away Attack on language from Shaq to shark Defusing the turkey bomb Driving While Stupid I'm living in a perpetual state of confusion Traveling with little ones is just plane crazy It's time to unmask a more traditional Halloween U.S. needs to shoot for a better class of criminals Mountain man training involves some trash talk Ten rules for making the world a much better place A slide down memory lane reminds me I got burned This latest research is enough to drive you nuts Wrestling with night critters gives me butterflies Silly songs get this old teapot into some hot water Kids better wise up, or they're doomed to repeat Overweight? I'm in training for the next Ice Age The bleu plate special proves just ducky on this trip Just weighting for the day I can build a better body Better to light a single gift candle than to curse your wife These camping tips will make for some happy trails I'm shooting the rapids with eyes wide shut People's bad grammar is enough to make me sic Toilet water as a weapon? That idea really stinks The carefree days of summer begin with the ants in my pants Heartland's moovers & shakers are an udder disgrace I've found a guy who can do this better than I can If you really love Dad, give him a big box of nothing Graduates, the world is your oyster — and it's shut How to look good in a swimsuit — no ifs, ands or butts Trip proves I'm the king of my own castle The writer vs. the writher beats the Hil & Obama fight Complain about gridlock? That's just a dead end New phone tactics help me develop new hangups For faithful readers, a course in Journalism $1.01 How to speak English very much better When it comes to laundry, men are all washed up This houseguest is ready to throw in the towel Fixing your home can truly be a bonding experience The lies about this mammal just drive me batty In spin cycle of love, hard to be delicate It's just not the time to thumb our nose at bagels Latest fitness Rx for men is a yawn My daughter's party, I'll cry if I want to Sanguine ride on rabid transportation One experiment worth repeating Nothing like a good trip to help me see the light The lord of the dance doesn't have anything on me Invention clearly worth the brewhaha Safe on the slopes Why-oh-why-oh-why-oh… A gross national columnist Mr. Language Person: Weird word I (cough) was a teenage smoker! Frogs hop into the headlines Great American turkeys Mr. Fixit strikes again ‘Einstein Gap’: It's all relative Lost in space The Trojan Twinkie Caper MR. LANGUAGE PERSON: WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE! Feeding your worst fears Sock it to 'em, sartorially The rubber band man Does public art make sense? Needling the birthday boy On calamities (in the sky and on your head) Modern medical mysteries Bored games Dave's Field of Nightmares Lewis and Clark stepped here! The ultimate water gun Poetic license, with no rhyme or reason Great moments in science This won't hurt a bit One giant leap for frogkind My visit to Nether-Netherland Smile and say cheese Shooting carps in Wisconsin The perfect storm Stickup in aisle 3 Please don't feed the tourists Land of the Frozen Earwax The birth of wail Honk if you're married and can't cope with anger Rabbit ears get poor reception Percentage of frogs in food jumps Night of the living roach Mr. Language Person: Some words of wisdomality Mind your P's and Q's and teas Loose lips sink sequels NOW WE'RE COOKIN'! The right to Bear clubs Science: It's just not fair Road warrior specials Where's the beef? (Low fat) There is nothing like a male (guys) MOTIVATE! THEN FAIL! NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS Rooting for the midgets of the Midway Revolt of the rodents He can drive any truck named ‘Tonka’ All bets are off How do you spell S-A-T? Sour grapes and mud Pro golf: A game of non-stop boredom Guard-dog vigilance is nothing to sniff at Warm and fuzzy Cold War memories The funny side of ‘Beowulf’ HOLY HEAT WAVE, BATMAN! Abs-olute madness Beware of brainy bugs I'm in a sorry state The frog plague: The inside story If she had a hammer…. Keeping an eye on crime Camping and Lewis and Clark When in Iowa, don't forget to duck Junior takes the wheel Growing old with Dave Sites for sore eyes Beware of sheep droppings Ireland, land of bad Elvis Mr. Peabrain's misadventures When they're out to get you, keep cool Mothers of invention Kill 'em with kindness © 2006, The Miami Herald Distributed by Tribune Media Services, Inc.

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