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May 20, 2013

Richard A. Serrano: Is Meir Kahane's assassin now a changed man?

Hannan Adely: Town raises Palestinian flag at City Hall

Melissa Healy: Genetic copies of living people from embryos no longer science fiction
Morgan Housel: When smart investors do stupid things

Sharon Saloman, M.S., R.D.: Hunger games: Eat more, weigh less, without starving

Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : Jews Inducted into Rock Hall of Fame; Anton Yelchin co-stars in New "Trek" film; Kutcher (but not Kunis) visits Israel; Jewish TV Star Praises Jewish Rap Star

The Kosher Gourmet by Cathy Pollak: WARNING: This WALNUT CAKE WITH PRALINE FROSTING, perfect for afternoon coffee, is addicting
May 13, 2013

Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Why the giving of the document that would permanently change the world could only be done in desolation

David G. Savage: Church-state, literally? Supreme Court weighing public school graduation in a church

Emily Alpert: Recession dragged down birth rates for less-educated women
Morgan Housel: The deep downside of home ownership

Peter Teffer: Will Dutch police soon be stalking cybercriminals on your computer?

Heidi McIndoo, M.S., R.D.: Meatless 'meat' can have its own set of problems

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Celebrate! This must-try appetizer is delicate yet has depth of flavor: Corn-Leek Cakes with Caviar, Smoked Salmon and Creme Fraiche

May 10, 2013

Rabbi Berel Wein: Be all that you should be

Caroline B. Glick: The dirty little secret about Israel's Arabs

Mona Charen: Hawking's Moral Calculus: The man and the movement he embraces
Morgan Housel: The biggest retirement myth ever told

Sandi Doughton: Eyes may provide new insight into brain problems

Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : The Great Gatsby's Jewish Ties; Jews in the "Time 100 list" List; People's Most Beautiful Women

The Kosher Gourmet by Linda Gassenheimer: A sweet-hot meal: Pear salsa spices up salmon

May 8, 2013

Peter Ford: Why China is welcoming both Israel's Netanyahu and Palestinians' Abbas

Warren Richey: Obama administration quietly backs out of appeal over new contraceptive mandate

Fred Weir: At Kerry-Putin meeting, US-Russia relations thaw --- a tad
Amanda Paulson: Study reveals sad truths about community colleges

Harvard Health Letters: Evidence weak that zinc, echinacea are beneficial

The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Almost too pretty to eat, this colorful salad with Sicilian inspiration will tickle the taste buds and delight your visual sensibility

May 6, 2013

Edmund Sanders and Patrick J. McDonnell: Think Israel's objective in Syria is to weaken Assad or embolden the rebels? Think again

Brian Bennett: Israeli airstrikes may show weakness in Syrian defense

Michael Ollove: Millions of ex-felons, parolees and those on probation are about to be entitled to tax-payer paid health coverage
Karen Kaplan: Most men can skip PSA test for prostate cancer, urologists say

Kimberly Lankford: How to track down a lost life insurance policy

Dream of Mars exploration achievable, experts say

The Kosher Gourmet by Susan M. Selasky: EGGPLANT WRAPS are an easy, sumptuous and scrumptious meal

May 3, 2013

Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Human Courage and the Unavoidable, Disturbing Text

Steven Emerson: Attorney General Fights CAIR in Court, Lauds it in Public

Mediterranean diet helps beat dementia: study
Harvard Health Letters: When to be screened for a hearing problem

Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : Iron Man's Jewish Connections; Marc Maron's New TV Show; Martin Landau Grows Up with Israel; Shalom, Allan Arbus

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: A sweet surprise for Mother's Day dessert

May 1, 2013

Jonathan Rosenblum: An Improbable Journey to Orthodoxy

Jonathan Tobin: Blame Obama, Not Israel for Syria Push

Kids, kittens the Same? With employee perks at struggling Internet pioneer Yahoo! it's hard to tell
Halena M. Gazelka, M.D.: Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: What you need to know about implanted pain relief devices

Sandy Kleffman: Artificial kidney offers hope to patients tethered to a dialysis machine

Jessica Shugart: When it comes to math, MRIs may be better than IQs

The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: The celebrated chef on how high-maintenance ASPARAGUS RISOTTO need not be

April 29, 2013

Roy Gutman: Poland's new Jewish museum celebrates life, doesn't revisit Holocaust

Mark Clayton: Terrorism in America: Is US missing a chance to learn from failed plots?

Kim Murphy: Boston Bomber's 'Svengali' Revealed
Morgan Housel: He's rich, smart and old: Listen to him

Thomas Salinas, D.D.S.: Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: The safety of amalgam fillings

Harvard Health Letters: Tomatoes and stroke protection

Pete Spotts: Tiny satellites + cellphones = cheaper 'eyes in the sky' for NASA

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Swing into spring with lemon cream pie

April 26, 2013

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: The world is a mirror

Caroline B. Glick: Time to confront Obama

Clifford D. May: Defense in the Age of Jihadist Terrorism
Kimberly Lankford: New strategies ease pain of paying for long-term care insurance

Howard LeWine, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Too much ibuprofen?

Sharon Palmer, R.D.: How to feel your best -- with plenty of energy, a healthy weight and optimal mental and physical function -- without driving yourself batty

Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom: Jewish Major Leaguers, 2013; New Movies and Comedy Show; Shalom, 'Lumpy' (Leave it to Beaver)

The Kosher Gourmet by Emily Ho : A bright and cheerful salad to herald the warmer months ahead

April 24, 2013

Steven Emerson: Boston Bomber Exposes Islamist Secret

Morgan Housel Admit it: No one has any idea what's going on
Harvard Health Letters: Can you get headaches from headache medication?

Kerri-Ann Jennings, M.S., R.D.: How to easily get more Omega-3s in your diet

Melissa Healy: Pot in a pill: All the pain relief without the smoke

The Kosher Gourmet by Susan Russo: Chipotle Chili Butternut Squash Soup is bold, zesty, hot

April 22, 2013

Ken Dilanian: Counterterrorism's future is unclear

US man departing country arrested on terror charges
Barbara Williams: An unorthodox but growing treatment in a 9-year-old's battle against cancer

P.J. Skerrett, M.D.: How to recognize a good whole grain product

Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom: Teen actor Jonah Bobo in New Flick: Hunky James Wolk on Mad Men; Erich Segal's Daughter Writes Prize-Winning Jewish Novel


Jewish World Review August 20, 2007 / 6 Elul, 5767

Names in the news

By Paul Greenberg


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | American Media, owner of Weekly World News, is shutting down the grocery-store tabloid that once exposed 12 U.S. senators as space aliens. That's right: There were only 12 back then. Long before The Onion, the W.W.N. was reporting the whereabouts of Elvis (Kalamazoo, Mich.) and publishing photos of Heaven taken by the Hubble telescope. Some of its headlines will remain classics. For example, "Dead Rock Stars Return on Ghost Plane" and "Crazed Dieter Mistakes Dwarf for Chicken!" But now its circulation has fallen under 90,000 and this week's will be its last issue.


How come? According to the dead-serious news release, the paper will be folded "due to the challenges in the retail and wholesale magazine marketplace." What does that mean, exactly? Maybe it's a corporate exec's way of saying that the so-called real news is already so outrageous that fiction can't compete with it. Or maybe the Weekly World News has actually been kidnapped by space aliens and we're not being told. We wouldn't be surprised. By anything we read in a grocery-store tabloid.


Whatever the reason for the demise of the W.W.N., we're going to miss headlines like "Headless Body in Topless Bar." Oops, that was the New York Post. All these tabloids tend to blur in the mind.


With tabloids, the more outrageous the news the better. What makes them so amusing? It's their talent for parodying those of us in the oh-so-serious "profession" of journalism. Picking one up is like listening again to Edward R. Murrow's sonorous old "This … I Believe" deepthink series of radio essays by generic Ordinary Americans — only not as maddening. Since the humor of mock tabloids like The Onion is intentional.


Xinhua, Communist China's news agency, reports that Beijing is going to regulate reincarnation in Tibet, one of the world's longest occupied countries. The commissars in Beijing have had it with these living Buddhas popping up all over the place, so the State Administration for Religious Affairs in that officially atheist country is to have the final say-so on which Buddhas may reincarnate where.


It's not enough for the "People's Republic" to assert control over every thought on the Chinese mainland and environs, now it's going to keep a tight rein on the next world, too. It's all kind of funny — if you don't have to live in a country monitored by Big Brother.


As of September 1, the Buddhas will have to submit their application for reincarnation, doubtless in triplicate, to the Religious Affairs bureau before being recognized in their next life. The new regulations are described by Xinhua as "an important move to institutionalize the management of reincarnation of living Buddhas." And, no, this dispatch did not originate with the soon-to-expire Weekly World News, which some of us are hoping to see reincarnated. Some news is just too unbelievable to make up. Can this be what Marx and Lenin had in mind when they started out? Mao, maybe.


Hugo Chavez, the Venezuelan strongman and another great friend of the working man, is now out to change his country's constitution so there will be no limit on the president's — namely, his — terms in office. That way, he can be president-for-life, much like his Cuban mentor, Fidel Castro. Is anybody surprised? Beneath every Latin champion of the proletariat there's just another caudillo. And their line is always the same: Obey my every dictate and be free!


Mikhail Gorbachev, last commissar of all the Russias, has been heard from. He's to appear in commercials for Louis Vuitton, the French luxury label, along with other celebs like Steffi Graf, Andrea Agassi and Catherine Deneuve. So what's wrong with that? Comrade Gorbachev did set out to reform Soviet Communism, didn't he? He promised to peel away its injustice, tyranny, and inefficiency — and soon discovered there was nothing else there. He'd reformed it out of existence. It was like removing the criminality from a criminal conspiracy.


Now the old party boss is posing as the very image of capitalist decadence. It's a step up. In a way, he's a role model for reform. The world would be a better place if Hugo Chavez and Fidel Castro were hawking luxury goods instead of dictating to their countrymen.


Rolandas Milinavicius, the owner of a car dealership in — where else? — Altanta, has been charged in the deaths of two of his employees after he was reported to have told police he'd shot both of them because they kept asking for raises. Goodness. No matter how pesky employees can be, couldn't Mr. Milina-vicious have just said No? This is the kind of news that gives one pause. Here I was just about to ask the boss for a raise….

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JWR contributor Paul Greenberg, editorial page editor of the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, has won the Pulitzer Prize for editorial writing. Send your comments by clicking here.

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