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Jewish World Review
March 6, 2008
/ 29 Adar I 5768
Thank you very much. It's great to be here.
You know, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over again
and expecting a different result. We are going to do things differently
and expect a different result. And if we don't do things differently,
well, the results we get, well, they'll be the results we deserve. Thank
We deserve better results, and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I'm
running for the presidency of the United States of America. If you want
the same results done in a different way, then you're going to get the
same results, only achieved differently.
If, however, you want different results with a different way, but not
done the same way, without the same results, but with new results in a
new way, while ensuring the new results are much more new than the old
results we've had the old way, then I'm sure you'll agree with me that
we, ladies and gentlemen, must work toward a different way, to achieve
results in a different way than the way we used to achieve the results
differently. Thank you.
Change is never easy. Change is hard. Some change is harder than others.
And easy change is never as easy as hard change, if only because hard
change is hard. Changing the easy to the hard is harder than changing
the hard to the easy.
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But if, ladies and gentlemen, you are looking for easy change done the
hard way, then that hard change will not be easy, if only because change
is hard, and harder change is much harder when it is hard than when it
is easy. This is especially the case if you use the same way of changing
results that ultimately result in change done the hard way. And that is
why I am proposing hard change with a different approach that could
ensure a different change than we've had in the past with the same
approach only with different results with easy change than the hard
change that we've had when change was, in fact, easy. Thank you very
We must have hope. Hope is what we must have. If you have no hope, then
you are without it more than you would be if, indeed, you had hope.
Without hope, there is only hopelessness. If you have hopelessness, then
those without hope will never have hope because those who have it, do,
and those who don't, don't.
And that is why I intend to hope that we may have more hope, so that
those without hope can get it from those who do have hope. So the
hopeful must share the hope with the hopeless to reduce the hopeless
while uplifting the hopeful. And I certainly hope that we can all agree
that hope alone without hoping for those without hope is, in fact, a
recipe for further hopelessness. Thank you.
I ask you not to take a chance on me, but to take a chance on your own
aspirations. And aspirations are nothing without inspiration. And with
inspiration comes perspiration. So I ask you to aspire to perspire so
that you may inspire. And with your inspiration, coupled with the
aspirations of those who perspire, that perspiration will create further
inspiration to which all of us can aspire. And those who inspire the
most will perspire the most, only because their aspirations create the
greatest inspirations. And it is a false choice to think you can have
inspiration without perspiration.
So, if you can't stand the heat in the kitchen, better get yourself out,
unless you're popping popcorn! Until you see the whites of their eyes,
then, by god, don't you fire! I have but one life to give to my country,
but I sure do regret it! We have nothing to fear, but fear itself,
especially when fear fears us back! Ask not what you can do for your
country, but what your country can do for you! Si, se puede! Pass the
guacamole. Hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, special orders do not
upset us. Boo-ya!
So to sum up, in conclusion, per se, so to speak, if you will, on the
one hand, if not on the other, let me say this: Don't do drugs!
Thank you, and may God bless you, and may G-d bless America!
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