 |
|
April 21, 2014
April 18, 2014
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology
John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain
The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious
April 14, 2014
Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time
Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic
Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships
Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin
Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate
Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure
April 11, 2014
Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden
Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does
Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer
Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You
April 9, 2014
Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?
Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau
Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau
Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease
April 8, 2014
Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease
Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear
April 4, 2014
Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children
John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet
John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds
Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves
April 2, 2014
Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?
Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities
Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene
|
| |
Jewish World Review
Nov. 17, 2006
/ 26 Mar-Cheshvan 5767
Bad taste merchants strike again
By
Greg Crosby
| 
|
|
|
|
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
If you haven't heart yet, there's a new book coming out just in time for the holidays. Better put it on your gift giving lists to family and friends because this is the book that will brighten up just about everyone's spirits at Christmastime this year. Whether it's Christmas or Hanukkah, this is the gift for everyone. Yes, you guessed it - O. J. Simpson has written a new book called "If I Did It" which will detail how he would have committed the killings of his wife, Nicole, and Ron Goldman "IF," that is, he had actually done it.
Of course we all know Simpson really didn't do the murders so this book is just kind of all in fun. A real holiday hoot. Just light-hearted whimsical speculation of how he "might" have slaughtered his ex-wife - y'know, the mother of his two youngest children. I wonder if Simpson's kids will get a kick out of reading it. Hey, nice book, dad! Way to go!
Oh yeah, the perfect book for the holidays. This is just the kind of book that would make for a fun read on a cold winter's night as you snuggle in your overstuffed chair next to a warm fire, right? Maybe a little bedtime story for the kids, what do you think? Or how about this - after dinner the family could gather around in the parlor, sing a few seasonal carols, then dad could read a few passages from jolly old O. J.'s book out loud. It might start a new kind of family holiday tradition.
ReganBooks, an imprint of HarperCollins, is publishing the book. And to squeeze out all the hype they can, Publisher Judith Regan will be doing a two-part interview with Simpson on the Fox network to run on two consecutive days just after Thanksgiving. Just a little extra turkey for those who haven't had enough. I can imagine the hard hitting questions Judith will be asking Simpson. "So, if YOU were going to cut Nicole's throat, would you have chosen a large butcher knife or a smaller switchblade?" "How would you rate the killings on a scale of one to ten?" "How do you suppose the murders could have been done better?"
I'm sure Judith Regan is smart enough to garner all the publicity she can out of this thing. She certainly has timed it right since Christmastime is the hottest selling season of the year. It seems only natural for her to take advantage of the big toy selling period. It wouldn't surprise me to find out that she has assembled a massive merchandising program behind this "event." Some of the more obvious licensed products might include the following:
1. O.J. and Nicole and Ron Goldman action figures. The Nicole and Ron dolls come complete with authentic knife wounds. Knife, gloves, and blood sold separately.
2. "If I Did It:" - the board game. Follow the path through Brentwood right along with O.J. as he drives his white Bronco along the route taken on the fateful night.
3. Official licensed O.J. knife.
4. White Bronco battery-operated toy SUV (disguise and bag of get-away money sold separately)
5. "If I Did It" wearing appeal. To include T-shirts, O.J. P.J.'s, sweats, and running shoes.
6. "If I Did It" computer and video games
7. Full range of children's book product including comics, coloring and activity books, and a special O.J. pop-up book.
8. "Tickle Me Kato"
9. Official O.J. leather glove (only one)
10. Official O.J. Bruno Magli murder shoes (comes in extra large size only)
The Judith Regan "If I Did It" interview with O.J. should be followed up with a weekly
Show. Maybe a reality "At Home With O.J." show. Or "Dancing With Star Murderers." There might even be a movie in this, with O.J. playing himself. I guess we'd have to use actors for Nicole and Ron since they're not available.
There is definitely room for follow-up books. The Simpson kids could write, "If Our Dad Did It." Then Simpson could write another one called, "Okay, dammit -I Did it!" Since he has already been tried and found "not guilty" he can now admit that he really did do it without fear of punishment. That's the law.
Yup, this is shaping up to be an O.J. Holiday Season. So follow O.J.'s example, avoid the rush and do your Christmas chopping early. Happy Homicide, everyone!
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. A freelance writer in Southern California, you may contact him by clicking here.
Greg Crosby Archives
© 2006, Greg Crosby
|
|
Columnists
Toons
Lifestyles
|
