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Jewish World Review August 31, 2007 / 17 Elul 5767 Who's the Animal? By Greg Crosby http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Just about the time you think progress is being made regarding how people treat poor dumb animals, up pop some jerks like football player Michael Vick and rapper DMX to prove that there are some people that are more animal-like than animals are. These lowlifes promote, train and use dogs for fighting - torturing, starving and killing many of them "for sport." These two guys are making plenty of dough, so they're not in it because they need money. No, they're in it because they get off on it. What loathsome dirt bags! Imbeciles like Vick, in their sick warped minds, may think that dog fighting is a macho thing, but it's the activity of evil, brain-deficient cowards. I don't know what it is with monsters like these. Obviously there are more than a few pieces missing from their brains. You can start with the pieces labeled decency, compassion, morality, kindheartedness, and humanity - the brains of these bums have none of those. Evil, cruel, contemptuous, despicable - no words I can think of are strong enough to describe them. Actually I can think of a couple of really perfect terms, but they won't let me use that kind of language in my column. Actor Jamie Foxx has gone on record justifying Vick's actions by claiming that dog fighting is a cultural thing with African Americans. In effect saying, "It's a black thing, you wouldn't understand." So, the implication is, if we condemn Vick or any other black person for engaging in dog fights, then we are racist. There's just no limit to the extent that inhumane illegal behavior can be justified by some. And by the way, even IF it is true that dog fighting is simply part of black culture (which I tend to doubt), then it's high time that segment of the "black cultural experience" be exposed and eradicated forever in this country. Not all intercity cultural pursuits are decent and wonderful, no matter what the multiculturalists teach in our schools. The NFL has suspended Vick without pay indefinitely as part of a plea agreement. He's also lost a lucrative commercial endorsement. Nice start, but nowhere near good enough in my opinion. Vick really needs to go to jail. And If DMX is also proven guilty; he needs to go into the slammer right along with Vick. Maybe they can even room together. Maybe they'll even kill each other. Better them then innocent dogs. Here's how the punishment plays out in my fantasy justice scenario: The prison first starves both of them, and then throws them into a cage with one piece of meat on the floor to fight over while the other inmates watch and make bets on which jerk will survive (I'm betting on the piece of meat, myself). That would be the one and only "Survivor show" I would ever consider watching. But that wouldn't be the end of it. The survivor is then thrown into a cage of badass sociopathic 300 pound gang-banger lifers who make the "winner" their own personal sweetie for the next 20 years. Now that's justice. And speaking of justice, some folks are complaining that all the bad little celebrity girls (Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, et al) never really get punished enough for any of their law breaking. Well, yes this is true, but it was ever thus in this town, I'm afraid. LA cops and city officials have always given the celebs a great deal of latitude in their bad behavior. You can go back decades - the story was the same for the silent film stars. Usually looking the other way, giving the stars a pass, cops and DA's are no less star-struck than the rest of the population. And it's not only here. Big shots in every town, in every state are treated better than just regular folks. That's why everybody wants to be rich, famous and influential - so you don't have to sit in the city drunk tank all night with the other meatheads throwing up on your shoes. Being famous and or influential buys you a lot - the best tables in restaurants, never waiting in line for anything, getting great seats for concerts, theatre, and sporting events, being "comped" at hotels, spas, and cruise ships, and getting plenty of other free stuff. Part of the privilege package also includes not being punished as severely as plain ol' ordinary people when you do bad things. That's why they call it "privilege." Welcome to the show, "Celebrity Skating." It may not be fair, but it's the way it works in real life. If you want fair, go to Pomona. But in the case of Michael Vick and anyone else charged with keeping and using dogs for fighting and gambling, it's a federal rap. Federal prosecution charges are much more serious and because of that, the chances of celebrity skating are not very likely. It's not like being pulled over for drunk driving in LA; the feds are not quite as star-struck as the local cops. Remember Martha Stewart. Vick and his lawyers know this is serious stuff, and that's why he finally owned up to what he did and gave a contrition press conference. And there is something else to be considered for anyone who thinks that they might like to engage in the leisure pursuits of Michael Vick. Americans love their celebrities. They love their sports heroes. But Americans love their dogs a whole lot more. You want to be baaaad? Go ahead get yourself tattooed from head to toe. Take drugs, get drunk, crash cars, say stupid things, even kill your wives. But don't mess with our dogs. It really isn't cool, man. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. A freelance writer in Southern California, you may contact him by clicking here. Greg Crosby Archives © 2006, Greg Crosby

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