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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review January 16, 2009 / 20 Teves 5769

Ever Wonder?

By Greg Crosby


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Do you ever wonder about silly, trivial stuff? Not major things, like life or death or war or peace, but small irritating stuff. Like why do the weathermen on TV have names that sound like the weather? Johnny Mountain, Dallas Rains are two examples of local West Coast weathermen with weather names. And I think there was a guy named Storm on the East coast, no kidding. Don't try and tell me that these are the real names for these guys. No way. Right, just a crazy coincidence that the guy doing weather is named Bobby Mudslide. I'm surprised there isn't a weatherman called Jack Frost. Maybe there is some place.


And now there are lots of new young girlies doing the weather on the local stations. I don't know how many of them are meteorologists or how much they really know about climate and weather, but they know one thing - they know how to stand in front of a map so you can't read the temperatures that are printed on it. They don't have weather-sounding names, but they all dress in tight-fitting, cling-y outfits. These babes look like they're auditioning for the Marisa Tomei part in "My Cousin Vinny."


Ever wonder why they need two anchor people to sit in front of the camera and read the news? Why can't you just have one person do it? For the longest time the big thing on all the local stations was to have a man and a woman sharing the anchor. Then it changed to one man of one color and one woman of another color. Now the trend seems to be two women anchors. Have you noticed that most of the field reporters now are young women? What happened to the guys? Staying home with the kids, I guess.


If you were from another planet and came to earth and put on the television to the Fox News Channel, you'd assume that all the lawyers in America are young blonde women. Where do they all come from? All of Fox's legal pundits are glamorous-looking babes. Does the station send out a casting call for beautiful long-haired blonde attorneys? Now, don't get me wrong, I'd rather look at a cute little blonde talking the law then some slimy, swarthy, shyster defense attorney with a thousand dollar haircut, wearing a jewel encrusted watch and a five-thousand dollar designer suit.


And speaking of sleazebags, how is it that a mega-crook like Bernard Madoff doesn't go to jail after pulling off the biggest Ponzi scheme in history that cost investors BILLIONS of dollars? A federal judge refused prosecutors' requests to jail Madoff after he violated a court order by mailing more than $1 million worth of valuables to friends and family members. Obviously this crook is getting his family and friends to stash his valuables away for him, out of the sight and grasp of the public and prosecutors. Why isn't this goniff in prison? Why aren't all his assets being seized and liquidated to pay back a portion of what he stole from all those people and charitable organizations? Yeah, at the risk of showing my super-cynical side again, I guess its all about who you know, who you grease, and who you have the goods on. Bums like this guy always get away with it. It's just too damn true and too damn bad.


On a lighter note, ever wonder what the last words were of some famous people? We've all heard of "famous last words" and I found these on the web. Who knows how true any of them are, but you've got to admit, they're fun to read, in any case.


Bob Hope: "Surprise me."


Bing Crosby: "That was a great game of golf, fellers"


Conrad Hilton, when asked if he had any last words of wisdom for the world: "Leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub."


William Saroyan: "Everybody has got to die, but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case. Now what?"


Thomas Edison: "It is very beautiful over there."


Humphrey Bogart: "I never should have switched form scotch to martinis."


Eugene O'Neill: "I knew it. I knew it. Born in a hotel room, and G-d damn it, died in a hotel room."


Ludwig van Beethoven: "Friends applaud, the comedy is finished."


P.T. Barnum: "How were the receipts today at Madison Square Garden?"


And with that, I give you my last words for this week's column. "Have a good week, dear readers!"

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.


JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. A freelance writer in Southern California, you may contact him by clicking here.

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© 2008, Greg Crosby

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